Top 423 Quotes & Sayings by Bill Vaughan

A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm.

By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.

The Vice-Presidency is sort of like the last cookie on the plate. Everybody insists he won't take it, but somebody always does.

To God, thy country, and thy friend be true.

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.

Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them.

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.

A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works.

I'm an actor. And I guess I've done so many movies I've achieved some high visibility. But a star? I guess I still think of myself as kind of a worker ant.

We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics.

Man is the animal that intends to shoot himself out into interplanetary space, after having given up on the problem of an efficient way to get himself five miles to work and back each day.

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas.

People learn something every day, and a lot of times it's that what they learned the day before was wrong.

In the game of life, it's a good idea to have a few early losses, which relieves you of the pressure of trying to maintain an undefeated season.

Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man's lifetime income - which he then spends sending his son to college.

If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it's another nonconformist who doesn't conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity.

Maybe the answer to Selective Service is to start everyone off in the army and draft them for civilian life as needed.

Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking.

The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them.

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election.

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.

Muscles come and go; flab lasts.

The groundhog is like most other prophets; it delivers its prediction and then disappears.

The whale is endangered, while the ant continues to do just fine.

It would be nice if the poor were to get even half of the money that is spent in studying them.

Blushes are the rainbow of modesty.

Nothing is more irritating than not being invited to a party you wouldn''t be seen dead at

One of the quickest ways to become exhausted is by suppressing your feelings.

In the next century it will be the early mechanical bird which get the first plastic worm out of the artificial grass.

The wolf changes his coat, but not his disposition.

The same sun that melts butter hardens clay.

Bottom is bottom, even if it is turned upside down.

I believe that God will help us to forget things, the memory of which would do us harm, or rather that He will enable us to remember only so much of them as will be for our good, and we, ourselves, not emotionally overwhelmed. The pain endured. The lesson learned. Let it now be forgotten! Face the future with courage, cheerfulness, and hope. Give God the chance and He will make you forget all that it would be harmful to remember.

Virtue, like a dowerless beauty, has more admirers than followers.

The eyes are the amulets of the mind.

Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seamed with scars; martyrs have put on their coronation robes glittering with fire, and through their tears have the sorrowful first seen the gates of Heaven.

As a nation we are dedicated to keeping physically fit - and parking as close to the stadium as possible.

Some idea of inflation comes from seeing a youngster get his first job at a salary you dreamed of as the culmination of your career.

It's never safe to be nostalgic about something until you're absolutely certain there's no chance of its coming back

You cannot speak of the ocean to a frog that lives in a well.

Look for strength in people, not weakness; for good, not evil. Most of us find what we search for.

Experience is something I always think I have until I get more of it.

Keep strong if possible; in any case, keep cool.

People who have little to do are excessive talkers.

Do not ask God the way to heaven; He will show you the hardest way.

Hay smells different to lovers and horses.

Progress is a continuing effort to make the things we eat, drink, and wear as good as they used to be.

It might be a good idea if the various countries of the world would occasionally swap history books, just to see what other people are doing with the same set of facts.

The pretender sees no one but himself, Because he has the veil of conceit in front; If he were endowed with a God discerning eye, He would see that no one is weaker than himself.

Of all the agonies in life, that which is most poignant and harrowing--that which for the time annihilates reason, and leaves our whole organization one lacerated, mangled heart--is the conviction that we have been deceived where we placed all the trust of love.

Retirement, we understand, is great if you are busy, rich, and healthy. But then, under those circumstances, work is great too.

At bank, post office or supermarket, there is one universal law which you ignore at your own peril: the shortest line moves the slowest.

A statesman is any politician it's considered safe to name a school after.

On the neck of a giraffe a flea begins to believe in immortality.

The fly runs toward the fire or lamp, thinking that it is a flower, and gets burnt up. Even so, the passionate man runs towards a false beautiful form, thinking that he can obtain real happiness, and gets burnt up in the fire of lust.

When gossip grows old it becomes myth.

The ideal Christmas gift is money, but the trouble is you can't charge it.

The Four Rules of Life: 1. Show Up 2. Pay Attention 3.Tell the Truth 4. Don't be upset at the results.

The suburb is a place where someone cuts down all the trees to build houses, and then names the streets after the trees.

All the problems of the world - child labor, corruption - are symptoms of a spiritual disease: lack of compassion.