Top 229 Quotes & Sayings by Bo Burnham

In high school, I worked eight hours a day just so I could get into the college of my dreams and say that I got in - and I never went.

I love Tim Minchin, Bill Bailey, and Hans Teeuwen, and I'm trying to synthesise elements of theatre into my show a little bit more.

I always wanted to be a comedian but never thought I'd be a musical comedian.

The strength of comedy is I don't have to answer to anybody, but sometimes you want to learn from other people and see your ideas strengthen by other people.

I try and write satire that's well-intentioned. But those intentions have to be hidden. It can't be completely clear, and that's what makes it comedy.

Once a week, I like to slip into a deep existential depression where I lose all my sense of oneness and self-worth.

I have a show on MTV called 'Zach Stone Is Gonna Be Famous.' I think that's a secret to a vast majority of America.

I think I wear my hypocrisy on my sleeve. I would never say I'm not a complete hypocrite.

The quality of the work when I was 16... I've had my issues with it, but I've learned to forgive myself because I was 16 years old.

Facebook became ubiquitous when I was 16, so I vaguely formed a sense of myself a little bit. I had kind of learned to think a little bit before the stuff was everywhere.

People look at me and go, 'He's only successful because he's got a bunch of 16-year-old girls at his back who don't understand comedy.' Well, they do. In any case, no one hates me more than I do; no one's more self-conscious about that than I am.

I don't interact with people much.

Basically, I don't like to tweet stuff about my life. I only like to tweet jokes.

The Internet is so crazy, and you're exposed to so many things. In an hour, you can really jump around.

I'd love to do something that doesn't have my stupid face in front of it. I feel like I've exhausted what I can do with my own face.

Postmodern comedy doesn't work well with very old audiences, because it's making fun of the comedy they enjoy.

Being famous is complete luck, and that's something you can't bank on.

I didn't want to bash young people. I don't want to bash a kid for dreaming or wanting something or being slightly ambitious - that's not the problem. The actual problem is with the culture surrounding him.

Most of my songs make fun of myself.

I don't want to put meaning on what I do because I don't know what it is.

I have a pretty good math mind, so I can see patterns, but I don't have a great ear. It's like a tragedy - I can see so much more natural musical ability in so many other people.

I think it would collapse my heart if I was super famous. I don't have the nerve for it, I'm too anxious. I don't know how you're not obsessed with how people perceive you, because they're real people, you know? You can convince yourself that they don't really know you, and that's true, but how can it not hurt your feelings?

I'm grateful for every stupid mistake and dumb joke I tried to make.

You got to take a deep breath and give up. The system is rigged against you.

The average person has one Fallopian tube.

My success, literally, is your success figuratively.

Please don't stick with me if I start sucking.

I like to joke about being gay because it's something teenagers would never joke about.

'Words, Words, Words' was very much its title. It's just words, words, words and trying to show that I can pack as much material into an hour as I possibly could word count-wise.

I don't want you to think I'm better than people or that I know better than people.

I'm clearly doing what I want. I hope kids can see my act and feel like they can be slightly more comfortable in their own skin because I'm being so ridiculously comfortable in mine. I'm not that comfortable in my skin the moment I walk offstage. But I try to project that while I'm on it.

I do weird things, and people watch.

There's tons of dudes - like David O'Doherty, Tim Key, and Alex Horne - I made a lot of friends with people who are really incredible comics.

Everyone in my family is very supportive, and any mention of family in my show is just, in my idea, the funniest version of the family of the guy of who's performing.

I thought I had more of a European sense of humour than the average American comic.

I've kind of stopped valuing laughter as the end-all measurement of what I'm doing.

I became good friends with Jack Whitehall. I think he's great, such a great dude, and really funny.

I write about what I know: teenage dating, overly charged sexuality, all the things that make you uncomfortable.

The thing is, I always thought I could do stand-up, and so I just stayed focused on the belief that I could succeed.

I grew up listening to Steve Martin and Robin Williams, so I didn't ever intend to be a musical comedian. I sort of stumbled into it.

When I see someone filming me, I don't usually think, 'No, man, don't put this up online!' I'd think, 'Hey man, you don't get to go to shows very often, put down the camera and enjoy it!' I love going to theatre and to shows so much.

I don't really care about capitalizing on momentum.

I always wanted to be a comedian and actor.

I fully embrace myself as a hypocrite.

Uncharted territory is a good place to be in.

There's a certain line between jokes and music and poetry that's a bit blurred in my mind.

Life, to me, doesn't feel like a straightforward story; it doesn't make sense for me to get up there and just tell a story. Life feels like what my show feels like: chaotic and strange and disconnected.

I really like maths.

I don't mind having 16-year-old fans, but I hate just having 16-year-old fans. I want more diversity.

I'm bored way too easily. I'm staring at screens half the day. I need to be overstimulated. And how will that express itself artistically?

At one point when I was very young, when I was first starting out, I thought, 'Well, one day I'll be able to put all the music away and become a real comedian.' But then I realized there are amazing musical comedians out there, that musical comedy is probably something I'll always want to pursue.

I'm left-brained, so I'm all about a mathematical approach to language. I've always been interested in that.

Your hard work and talent will not pay off.

Don't worry, I'm hilarious.

A few people know me, and the few people that do know me only know me because they dig my stuff.

I would say don't take advice from people like me who have gotten very lucky. We're very biased. You know, like Taylor Swift telling you to follow your dreams is like a lottery winner telling you, 'Liquidize your assets; buy Powerball tickets - it works!'

You can give poor people this royal wedding to watch and make them feel good about themselves, or you can give them something useful like, I don't know... a toaster.

I'd much rather wait till my material is up to par, in my opinion, than rush it just so I can stay in the limelight a little longer.

I misdirect the audience, so they have no idea where they are or who they're listening to.

I'll stop when I think I'm not doing good stuff. I'll never exploit something just because people like it.