Top 49 Quotes & Sayings by Ellie Taylor

Explore popular quotes and sayings by an English comedian Ellie Taylor.

Last updated on April 14, 2025.

Eleanor Jane Taylor is an English comedian, television personality, actress, and writer. After appearing on Show Me the Funny in 2011, Taylor has appeared on numerous television shows, including 8 Out of 10 Cats (2011–2017), Fake Reaction (2013–2014), Mock the Week (2015–2019), The Lodge (2016–2017), Stand-Up Central (2017), The Mash Report (2017–2021), and Plebs (2018–2019). She has also presented the shows Snog Marry Avoid? (2012–2013) and Live at the Apollo (2016–2018).

English - Comedian | Born: November 28, 1983

Source: Wikipedia

My sister told me: 'You need to have a baby so that you've got someone to look after you when you're old.' And I was like: 'Hang on - I thought that's what the NHS was for? Unless the NHS is that screwed by the time I'm old, you've literally had to give birth to your own medical professional.'

Ellie Taylor

When I was younger it was people like Victoria Wood who I loved.

Ellie Taylor

I want to do everything, so when I started I wanted to be an actress, and I've always written funny things. I love that; it gives me a real sense of achievement and joy. I also love presenting. I'd never been interested in it before but found it pretty fun and easy, and I really enjoyed working with a group - standup is so lonely.

Ellie Taylor

Nothing gets a party started like some 110 per cent proof Ouzo from Kavos circa 2002.

Ellie Taylor

I tend to read quite serious things in order to try and appear superior.

Ellie Taylor

Everyone knows the feeling where you're in the pub and you make your mates laugh. It's awesome, you feel like you rock. That's what comedians want with a bit of extra ego.

Ellie Taylor

I prefer clothes with a waist rather than boxy shapes.

Ellie Taylor

I once hosted the Butcher Shop of the Year Awards. There's nothing like performing to the personification of the phrase a 'sausage fest' to hammer home how you've hit the big time.

Ellie Taylor

I'm quite ungainly.

Ellie Taylor

I remember I quite liked 'SingStar' for a while.

Ellie Taylor

Show Me The Funny' was not very successful ratings wise, but the right people saw me.

Ellie Taylor

I've had some bad gigs, don't get me wrong.

Ellie Taylor

I drink loads of water.

Ellie Taylor

I have no maternal instincts.

Ellie Taylor

I'd like to be on 'Graham Norton.' Just because I used to do the audience warm-up for the 'Graham Norton' show, and I just think that would be a beautifully lovely, typical end to a narrative. I like a neat ending.

Ellie Taylor

I did a standup show called 'Show Me the Funny,' so from that I got some TV stuff and people would book me for gigs. I wasn't really good enough at that point, so had to catch up with expectations.

Ellie Taylor

There was the phase I went through where I'd put streaks of red food colouring in my fringe as some kind of budget instant hair dye. Fine until it rained and I looked like I'd had a head injury.

Ellie Taylor

I was never thin enough to be a proper model and not big enough to be plus-size.

Ellie Taylor

I went out with a guy from Wolverhampton once. He took me to watch a Wolves match. A man in the seat behind me burned a hole in my coat with a cigarette.

Ellie Taylor

I want a dragon.

Ellie Taylor

I always showed off when I was a kid.

Ellie Taylor

Hogwarts is comforting.

Ellie Taylor

I'm not interested in babies at all. Babies to me are like wasps: pointless, irritating and even one can ruin a picnic. They're just not my bag at all.

Ellie Taylor

I was a massive geek.

Ellie Taylor

The real pleasure of cruising is arriving at a new destination.

Ellie Taylor

I feel like everyone could do with starting wearing SPF at least a decade earlier than they do, just for ageing.

Ellie Taylor

I would like to go to the Oscars. I'm not even talking about being nominated - although that would be lovely. Even if it was I won a competition on the back of a crisp packet to go to the Oscars I would like to go to the Oscars.

Ellie Taylor

With social distancing restrictions in place, many are finding themselves isolated from their support networks and suddenly navigating parenthood differently than they expected.

Ellie Taylor

When I've been on shows as a guest, I'm backstage, so I don't usually hear what the warm-up is saying, so I went and watched a couple of people do it and thought, 'Actually, I reckon this is do-able.' The audience is usually excited to be there; it's just getting a good chat with people.

Ellie Taylor

Don't get me wrong. I don't have a problem with anyone being proud to be a parent. I love children, some of my best friends used to be children. But I was fed up of these 'competitions,' so I decided to do the opposite, I decided to do the non-motherhood challenge and post five photos of myself which made me proud not to be a mother.

Ellie Taylor

I'm always in comfy clothes.

Ellie Taylor

I wear a lot of black, floaty things, but I've got lots of bright, flowery stuff, too.

Ellie Taylor

For many people, Christmas is indeed the most wonderful time of year. But the festive period can also bring its own unique stresses and strains. But don't despair: there are solutions to many - if not all - of these issues.

Ellie Taylor

I was working in a day job in marketing but I had my sights on doing an open-mic night.

Ellie Taylor

If I see a baby, I don't feel anything. It's like Theresa May walking past a homeless person.

Ellie Taylor

Lots of people do stand up shows with no narrative, but I love a beginning, a middle and an end.

Ellie Taylor

If you haven't truly died a million times as a comic you haven't gigged enough!

Ellie Taylor

People who have heard of me have heard of me mostly through presenting and asked, 'Why have you gone into comedy?'

Ellie Taylor

In group situations, I tend to be the quiet one.

Ellie Taylor

There's always someone out there being mean, but what upsets me is the spite. Why are you like that? Why are you so horrible?

Ellie Taylor

I can't drink anything after 9 P.M. otherwise I'm up all night.

Ellie Taylor

I feel like the timbre of your voice as a woman doesn't cut through as well as a loud bassy voice, so you need to noticeably speak up.

Ellie Taylor

My dad's pretty funny. He's funny for all of the wrong reasons. The first time I did standup at Edinburgh he sat in the front row and wore sunglasses because he didn't want to put me off.

Ellie Taylor