Top 24 Quotes & Sayings by Henry Beard

Explore popular quotes and sayings by an American author Henry Beard.

Last updated on December 18, 2024.

Henry Nichols Beard is an American humorist, one of the founders of the magazine National Lampoon and the author of several best-selling books.

American - Author | Born: 1945

Source: Wikipedia

"Play it as it lies" is one of the fundamental dictates of golf

Henry Beard

Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks - No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. Howard's excellent Tennis for Beginners.

Henry Beard

Hoeing: A manual method of severing roots from stems of newly planted flowers and vegetables.

Henry Beard

Hole in One: an occurence in which a ball is hit directly from the tee into the hole in a single shot by a golfer playing alone.

Henry Beard

Fairway: a narrow strip of mown grass that separates two groups of golfers looking for lost balls in the rough.

Henry Beard

If the wind is in your face, you swing too hard just to get the ball through it; if the wind is at your back, you swing too hard just to see how far you can get the ball to go.

Henry Beard

Bulb: potential flower buried in Autumn, never to be seen again.

Henry Beard

Follow through: The part of the swing that takes place after the ball has been hit, but before the club has been thrown.

Henry Beard

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.

Henry Beard

Handicap: an allocation of strokes on one or more holes that permits two golfers of very different ability to do equally poorly on the same course.

Henry Beard

Chef: Any cook who swears in French.

Henry Beard

You do not sew with a fork and I see no reason why you should eat with knitting needles.

Henry Beard

A driving range is the place where golfers go to get all the good shots out of their system.

Henry Beard

Advice to anglers: don't take advice from people with missing fingers.

Henry Beard

Few golfers are born with the natural talent for hitting the ball, but every player is blessed with the God-given ability to throw a club.

Henry Beard

I simply cannot imagine why anyone would eat something slimy served in an ashtray.

Henry Beard

Wear it if it clashes.

Henry Beard

Garden: One of a vast number of free outdoor restaurants operated by charity-minded amateurs in an effort to provide healthful, balanced meals for insects, birds and animals.

Henry Beard

It's often necessary to hit a second shot to really appreciate the first one.

Henry Beard