Top 117 Quotes & Sayings by Jennifer Coolidge
Explore popular quotes and sayings by an American actress Jennifer Coolidge.
Last updated on September 18, 2024.
As young, hot actors living in Hollywood, you get even more attractive.
Our secret desire as women is to have a guy who falls madly in love with us even though we're incredibly opinionated or we're not the sort of normal, polite, poised woman.
As a single woman, I reap the benefits of being Stifler's mom.
I do have to say, there is this incredible benefit to being older. I never thought I'd say that. I've figured out that show business isn't the end-all. I thought I'd never be tired of Hollywood, of the experience, and I have to say there's some relief. As you get older, your taste changes.
I am allergic to a certain kind of glue. Most eyelash glues are terrible, the glue in acrylic nails. I get a rash up my arm and face.
There's something about me that suggests I don't have an intelligent atom in me at all. So people say things to me that they wouldn't say to other people. Insulting, condescending things. They don't think I notice. But, of course, I'm taking it all in.
I have been able to sniff out a phony.
I always find the most depressing stuff most interesting.
Usually, when you're an actress, you have to audition 20 times.
Thank God for Stifler's mom. I don't know if life would be this fun if I didn't have that.
When it's going well, stand-up is the best thing in the world, but when it's not, it feels like all your toes are being pulled off one by one.
Girls are supposed to be feminine and demure. Comedy isn't about that, so you just have to unlearn it. Certain women are so pretty, they can't go weird enough to be funny. You have to be willing to be ugly. I'm lucky my face can look so hideous.
I'm kind of harsher than most people.
I wanted to be a dramatic actress. Life doesn't go the way you think it's going to go.
I hate Spanx.
Cate Blanchett and others, they get this broad range of all these cool people they can play. Some women really do get it all. For me, it is the same thing that happens over and over. I should change that and maybe write my own thing.
When you're an actress, there are only a few times you can really get paid. One of them is doing a sequel. They can't fake you or hire another actor to play you.
Standup is just dirtier, a far more risque kind of thing.
Unless you write your own movies... you can't really say what you want to say.
I love Australia, and I especially love those rugby players.
Short of spending $10,000, there is nothing you can do to your head to hide the fact that you're going bald.
When I go on 'The View,' or any of those talk shows, you really don't get to say what you want to say.
Meryl Streep was my hero. I wanted to be that type of actor more than anything.
I love that topic, the whole relationship thing, and I think that's why I love all this stuff, the Jane Austen stuff.
No one purposefully paints a bad painting. It's someone who's trying to do a good painting, but it's terrible. I have one with a matador, and the bull is going through the blanket. You can tell the painter didn't know how to paint it.
I always remember this neighbor who would ask me to babysit for her. She looked like Jayne Mansfield, and I remember babysitting for, like, five hours and she would pay me 80 cents, with a phony smile. I used to go home fuming to my mum.
A man's ability to haggle is never a turn-on. The only thing less romantic than how much you paid is how much you saved. The last thing we want to hear is how you talked the jeweler down on our new earrings.
I have a storage unit, as I moved out of a bigger house into a smaller house in L.A. I put all my stuff in a storage unit, where I have the most amazing collection of bad paintings, which took me 10 years to put together.
I would say 90 percent of the scripts that show up on my door are women who have had lots of plastic surgery that are married to rich men - sort of a trophy wife.
The one thing that has helped sustain my career as an actress and a comedian is that people generally view me as fundamentally stupid.
Dating is... weird.
I wasn't funny. My brother was the funny one in the family.
I've made a career of taking roles that other actresses didn't want.
'Best in Show' legitimized me, and it was a great experience in Vancouver for six weeks with all those dogs!
It's a great compliment when the beautiful ones laugh.
I went out with seven actors in a row. There are problems with that. I've had the really good-looking dramatic actor, and that has its problems. And then I'll go out with the funny guy. It's almost like the funny guy has more to prove.
People have this view, 'Oh, you're in movies, your life is so glamorous' but it can really suck.
I don't actually go on the Internet that much.
When you leave L.A. and go to another city, guys are normal again. They like girls their own age.
I dated a guy who played bad guys in movies all the time, and I think he was just a bad guy.
The minute I started doing comedy, the doors opened.
Stand-up is a weird animal. There are people who really want to know what you think about things, your opinion on life. But then there are people who think you're just that beautician in 'Legally Blonde,' who doesn't have opinions on anything. Or that I'm Stifler's mom and hot for it all the time.
The best thing about animated-feature people is that they are very laid-back people. You feel like you're showing up for a backyard barbecue.
Hair extensions and wigs are not the same thing. Wigs are for old ladies and drag queens. Extensions are for women who want longer hair. To be safe, never bring it up if you think a woman is wearing either. No good comes of it.
To be honest, sometimes I'm horrified because you don't really know what you look like. If I really knew what I was doing on-screen, I would try to stop doing it.
I live in New Orleans part of the year, and it's a really fun eating town. I bought two homes there, one to live in and one as an investment. They love to eat, drink and dress up in costumes. There are so many reasons to dress up - Mardi Gras, Halloween, Southern Decadence.
Gina Gershon was a year ahead of me in college.
The standup thing has been really fun, really seeing the United States instead of reading about it.
I have the improv background, but stand-up is different.
When I walk into a video arcade filled with 16- or 17-year-old boys, I may as well be Marilyn Monroe.
If you're playing a character that someone doesn't like, that's okay, but if you're voicing your own opinions, they actually don't like you!
A boyfriend has so much to do with a woman blossoming.
I read a script and I know immediately whether that role is for me or not.
I always date younger men. For some reason that's just the way it's gone, because younger guys have always asked me out and I accept.
I play so many weirdos in movies that it's nice to play an attractive woman.
It ends up being a terrible movie if you try and please everyone.
Keri Russell is one of the prettiest girls I've ever seen in my life. She's one of those girls that doesn't have that thing when you walk into the trailer in the morning, and your face is all bashed in - like a lot of actors, even the beautiful and handsome ones.
I wasn't very good in my serious acting class. Sometimes people took our class so seriously, so I used to, sort of, make fun of people after class. And so a friend of mine said, 'Why don't you do the comedy thing.' That's how it all worked out.
I was the cocktail waitress, and Sandra Bullock was the host, and this guy came in and persuaded me to try improv with Gotham City Improv.
I get the gold-digger part six times weekly. I can play those women into the ground, but I don't want someone telling me that's all I can do.
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