Top 346 Quotes & Sayings by Josh Billings - Page 6
Explore popular quotes and sayings by an American comedian Josh Billings.
Last updated on April 15, 2025.
Pride seems tew be quite equally distributed; the man who owns the carriage and the man who drives it seem tew have it just alike.
I never had a man come to me for advice yet, but what I soon discovered that he thought more of his own opinion than he did of mine.
Clothes form the intellect of the dandy.
I don't never have any trouble in regulating my own conduct, but to keep other folks' straight is what bothers me.
Silence never makes any blunders.
It is easy to assume a habit; but when you try to cast it off, it will take skin and all.
Fools carry their daggers in their open mouths.
The truly innocent are those who not only are guiltless themselves but who think others are.
There is gravity in wisdom, but no particular wisdom in gravity.
Early genius, like early cabbage, does not head well.
Wisdom that don't make us happier ain't worth plowing for.
You cannot analyze a kiss any more than you can dissect the fragrance of flowers.
Suicide is cheating the doctor out of job.
The man who ain't got an enemy is really poor.
Our continual desire for praise ought to convince us of our mortality, if nothing else will.
Some folks as they grow older grow wise but most folks simply grow stubborner.
Menny think tha luv their husbands almost tew deth, when in fack, tha are only jealous ov them.
Don't take the bull by the horns, take him by the tail; then you can let go when you want to.
The man who gets bit twice by the same dog is better adapted for that kind of business than any other.
One legged chickens, I know, are the least apt to scratch a garden.
You can reach stupidity only with a cannon ball.
Rumor is a vagrant without a home, and lives upon what it can pick up.
Society is composed of slow Christians and wide-awake sinners.
There's one good thing about tight shoes; they make you forget your other troubles.
It strains a man's philosophy the worst kind to laugh when he gets beat.
The dog that will follow everbody ain't worth a curse.
Music wasn't made to make us wise, but better natured.
Most everyone seems willing to be a fool himself, but he can't bear to have anyone else one.
Fortune is like a coquette; if you don't run after her, she will run after you.
Habits are like the wrinkles on a man's brow; if you will smooth out the one, I will smooth out the other.
There is no limit to the vanity of this world. Each spoke in the wheel thinks the whole strength of the wheel depends upon it.
Stupidity,--unconscious ignorance.
Vanity is a strange passion; rather than be out of a job it will brag of its vices.
Truth is the edict of God.
Never run into debt, not if you can find anything else to run into.
And now the lads and lasses, following the example of the birds, bill and coo together.
Fun is a sugar-coated physic.
Every man should know something of law; if he knows enough to keep out of it, he is a pretty good lawyer.
Seneca devoted much of his time to writing essays in praise of poverty, and in lending money at usurious rates.
A slander is like a hornet; if you cannot kill it dead at the first blow, better not to strike at it.
I never question a success, any more than I do the right of a bulldog to lie in his own gateway.
People who have nothing to say are never at a loss in talking.
It iz comparitively eazy tew repent ov the sins that we hav committed, but tew repent ov thoze which we intend to commit, is asking tew mutch ov enny man, now days.
Dr. Holmes says, both wittily and truly, that crying widows are easiest consoled.
Ill-nature is a sort of running sore of the disposition.
Titles are valuable; they make us acquainted with many persons who otherwise would be lost among the rubbish.