Top 276 Quotes & Sayings by Margaret Cho - Page 4

When I was 14, I told my mother I was going to drop out of high school and go do stand-up comedy. All she said was 'Oh maybe it's better if you just die,' because it was killing her that I was doing this.

[Fur] is really ridiculous. It's outrageous. We're not living in igloos. We don't need to trade pelts anymore. There is this diabolical idea that fur is fashionable. It's not. It's death. There's no excuse for it.

A few words about ‘trannychasing.’ I am not a trannychaser. Ok, actually I am a trannychaser. No I am not. I am a trannycatcher! Just kidding!

strange, there's so much religion in the world, but only enough to make us fight over who is right, not enough to make us love one another.

Something as important as marriage equality, which is now a constitutional right [in the USA], is something that cannot be denied. It's also very un-Christian, if you think about the way Christ was and Christ's teachings. This is not loving. This is anger. This is hatred. This is bigotry. And it's wrong.

I want to get married but I look at husbands the same way I look at tattoos. I want one, but I can't decide what I want, and I don't want to be stuck with something I'd grow to hate and have surgically removed.

Sexual fulfillment goals, to make them happen, you have to work on them as a project. I don't think it's a bad thing.

I got back from Toronto, where they had a severe outbreak of SARS - you know, Severe Asian Racism Syndrome.

White fragility! White people are so sensitive about race and racial conversations. I feel like I'm always walking on eggshells when I'm around white people.

Grow up and let anyone try to content with the adult you.

Most conservatives also believe in the death penalty, but not abortion, which proves they like to procrastinate.

The only thing that was sort of Asian [as a role model] was Hello Kitty. I don't want to model myself after Hello Kitty. She has no mouth.

You have to have a very holler-y sensibility. So they [the audience] know there's something worth listening to.

I feel like this song [Yello, "Oh Yeah"] was probably done in a couple of minutes in a studio. There was probably no thought behind it; they were just playing with some samples and threw it together. I feel like there's no dream behind the song. Usually there's a dream or some kind of passion attached to a song. This song feels very empty. It made a lot of money for the songwriters but at the expense of culture.

I love drugs, but I hate hangovers, and the hatred of the hangover wins by a landslide every time.

This was an era where I was going out every night seeing Sparks, Berlin, Duran Duran, and Split Enz. Amazing acts doing really weird stuff, and I was very open to music and letting it transform me.

When I do an Asian character or an Asian voice I'm doing one because that's my heritage and my family and where I come from. My family is of Korean descent and specifically North Korean descent. So it makes sense for me to talk about that issue because it's the only weapon I have to somehow avenge my family and my history.

Im not a mom, but I think the word mother is about wisdom.

There's vulnerability - so I have to make sure the audience is certain that I know what I'm doing. There's vulnerability there because my heart is open, but at the same time I definitely have a lot of "weapons" at my disposal. I have all the language, I have all of the moment - I have all of that to spar with somebody, to take anything on.

I helped deliver one of my best friend's children. I just was so amazed by my friend, because she was not just a woman, she was not just a mother. At that moment she was creation; she was life; she was God. And as I looked in her eyes, BOOM! Her pussy exploded.

We must know who we are, so we can know what we want, so we don't end up wanting the wrong thing and get it and realize we don't want it, because by then it's too late. We are powerful enough that we can manifest anything into our lives. To use this power with great care and love is the secret to living a happy life.

Political correctness sometimes does great work when it helps equalize the playing field when it comes to language, but it does a great disservice when it tries to silence a person of color.

All the songs on Yankee Hotel Foxtrot are the encapsulation of heterosexual love. I have different records for gay sex.

It was hard for me to do the show (All-American Girl) because a lot of people didn't even understand the concept of Asian-American. I was on a morning show and the host said, "Awright, Margaret, we're changing over to an ABC affiliate! So why don't you tell our viewers in your native language that we're making that transition?" So I looked at the camera and said, "Um, they're changing over to an ABC affiliate."

I think that gay people should have the right to get married by Elvis like everybody else.

I refer to myself as gay, but I’m married to a man.

I get a lot from great '90s artists like Juliana Hatfield, The Pixies, and bands like That Dog and The Breeders.

I started [performing] so young that it might have just been that I kind of had to grow up and make people understand that I was worth listening to, even though I was a child.

I’m not going to die because I failed as someone else. I’m going to succeed as myself.

I knew I was crazy because I was watching Jesus Christ Superstar and the part where Jesus carries the cross up the mountain, I actually said to myself, "Wow! That must be a really good workout! Yeah, because you're doing arms and cardio!"

I always wonder why Republicans hate gay marriage, because they certainly don't hate gay prostitutes.

I am a big Ellen fan. I have been one for quite a long time now. I used to do the local news talk shows with her in San Francisco, when we were both still kids.

It's not the best between my family and me. There are so many crimes left unpunished, debts unpaid, white elephants in the middle of the room that no one will even offer a peanut to. We are in the red, emotionally speaking.

I was in Toronto when they had a severe outbreak of SARS - you know, Severe Asian Racism Syndrome. I was in the airport and there were these big snowboarder guys and they had white masks around their necks, and as soon as they saw me, they put their masks on. So I went "cough, cough, cough... You wanna egg rorr?

Your goal is to write that masterpiece. Yello's masterpiece was "Oh Yeah." Whatever I say about the song doesn't matter, because it has a huge impact on how we remember the era.

Monogamy is so weird. Like when you know their name and stuff.

[An article about Cho] started out, "Funny, sexy, zaftig Margaret Cho..." What is "zaftig?" Isn't that German for "big fat pig?" I guess I was lucky - "zaftig" is kind of a nice word. It could have been, "Funny, sexy, OBESE Margaret Cho."

A lot of the actresses who were around when I started, I don't know where they are. Comics stick around.

I don't like to criticize music and I had a really hard time picking out the song I hate for this because I end up seeing and working with musicians all the time.

There's a lot of guy comics who I think are funny, but I generally am more excited about a special or a show where there are females.

I think that sometimes people [who overreact or lash out] will hang on to their point just because they're so embarrassed that they made it. They won't set it down because they are the authors of these [disproportionate responses] and they have a lot to be embarrassed about.

There's lot of social censorship now, especially in this era of ubiquitous social media.

I love Wilco's "I'm the Man Who Loves You." Nels Cline has that weird guitar slide at the beginning and the song is whispered actually.

There's this idea like feminism is humorless and humorless in a way that's like a whistleblower. Like you're going to - you're going to make sure that nobody has any fun. And that's not true at all. I think feminism allows me to do what I do, and I'm so grateful to the idea of it and grateful to all the women that came before.

I could definitely rock out to Kraftwerk's "Tour De France," Tubeway Army, or Gary Numan. All of that stuff has an infectious beat, but with "Oh Yeah," I can't even identify what's going on. It sounds like typewriter keys, a couple of synth notes and then this really deep "Oh yeah," which I always picture as Andre The Giant on vocals.

I don't have children, and I am not sure if I have wanted them or never wanted them. It's weird not to be able to decide. I don't know if I could stand that kind of commitment, or if I am really honest, I don't think that I could handle being that vulnerable to someone else.

Anger and comedy are really connected.

I'm not a body shamer. The word fat has been used to hurt me my entire life.

I was crazy about the song "Doot Doot," so I usually love this genre of weird, European electronic.

For me to be ten pounds thinner is a full-time job, and I am handing in my notice and walking out the door!!

I like to respond with jokes and to keep it as light as possible.

That notion that we're in the post-racism, post-sexism world is so not true.

It's completely unsexy [Yello, "Oh Yeah" 1985]. It does capture that weird '80s materialism and "We're gonna get it on now" vibe. But it's a very juvenile approach. It also became a weird signal for comedy, in the sense that when you heard the song, it meant comedy was happening on screen. I feel like this song was probably done in a couple of minutes in a studio.

I have a song about how much I hate emojis and the lazy thinking of people who use them. I wish that more people had respect for the English language.

Anything Vince Clarke, whether it's Erasure, Yaz, or Depeche Mode. It's basically R&B with synths. It's very sexy music and perfect for gay sex.

I definitely support free speech.

In some places it's actually very OK to be homophobic.

The intention is to make people laugh, to make people happy. It's unselfish, it's in the service of others, and as a comedian you are making yourself vulnerable in order to make others happy. And it has a transformative power.

My family has been deeply affected by the split of Korea, which divided it in half, basically, before I was born. There's no way to connect with my family now who are in North Korea because it's so isolated. We don't even know who is still there and who is alive, and if they are, what they are doing. Comedy is the only weapon I have to battle this totalitarianism.

No matter what these terrorists do, I refuse to be terrorized. All this requires is just a few alterations in our day to day lives. For example, my first instinct when I receive an envelope full of white powder... is to snort it! I just won't do that this time!