Top 132 Quotes & Sayings by Milton Berle - Page 3
Explore popular quotes and sayings by an American comedian Milton Berle.
Last updated on April 16, 2025.
War toys are scary. They have a rocket launcher with a bayonet attached, in case you miss.
My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay.
My son asked for very little - a kickstand, with a motorcycle attached.
I just bought a great gift for my boss - a leaky ant farm.
The only thing that can break a piece of Valentine candy is another piece of Valentine candy.
I bought a Christmas tree for twenty dollars. When I came home the next day, my wife was wearing it in her hair.
Valentine's Day is like Armistice Day - you declare a truce.
At the Christmas party, the secretary with the long red hair ate three pickles, and four salesmen panicked.
At Christmas you can get real bargains. I saw one item marked down ten dollars. It was a yacht.
Sir, I didn't deserve the grade you gave me on this test. Do you know a lower one?
Remember when you had your face lifted... and the guy brought it back.
She was nice to him on Valentine's Day. She gave him a heart-shaped rash.
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