Top 75 Quotes & Sayings by Terry McMillan

You know, one of my fears about living alone so long is that you get used to doing everything your own way.

Let me put it this way: when I read, I learned the world was not as small as my house. And that everybody in my home town was not representative of the way people in the world were raised. And that was what saved me.

I'm not an angry woman. I'm not bitter.

I like doing the readings and the autographing, but the interviewing gets a little tedious because you get asked the same questions every day and sometimes three or four times a day.

I would like to think that as a result of not just my own experiences, but at least being empathetic and compassionate about other people's experiences and plights and tragedies, that I am affected by it and learn from it.

I don't live my life as a writer. I'm a mother, an African-American woman, and I do everything that everybody else does - cook and a little bit of cleaning.

My stories are character driven.

It takes me forever to say my prayers these days, but I don't care, because this time around, I want to make sure God doesn't have to do any guesswork.

Write from your heart, and God will take care of the rest.

Can't nothing make your life work if you ain't the architect.

People need to be re - sometimes we need to reinvent ourselves and then get reacquainted with our better selves.

I'm more interested in interpersonal relationships - between lovers families, siblings. That's why I write about how we treat each other.

What's universal is the texture of our relationships. It's evolving. Times are changing with the women's movement. Men's roles are being redefined and, in some ways, they're confused.

I don't let negative criticism, for the most part, bother me.

I try to create characters that I am fascinated by on some level or intrigued by or can't stand.

I just believe that young people need to be able to learn how to write in their own voice. Just like a musician, you pride yourself on having your own distinct sound.

Every human being I know craves love and affection.

Few writers are willing to admit writing is autobiographical.

I can't stand that - those women in 'Waiting to Exhale' now. I can't stand them. But that's because I'm 53 and not 33. But what they were experiencing at 33, I identified with it.

There is a price for popularity. Critics look for your weaknesses, your flaws, anything that makes the work seem like a fluke and not seem worthy of all the attention it's getting.

As far as young kids go, my primary interest is to get parents to read to their kids. That's about the most you can do, I think.

Good parents have children who do terrible things and vice-versa.

I'm not trying to be a middle aged centerfold, I just want to look at myself naked and not be disgusted.

As a writer, you get to bring attention to something without preaching. I don't believe in being didactic. So if you dramatize something, you automatically bring attention to it if people read it.

Too many of us are hung up on what we don't have, can't have, or won't ever have. We spend too much energy being down, when we could use that same energy – if not less of it – doing, or at least trying to do, some of the things we really want to do.

What I do know is sometimes we love the wrong people and sometimes we marry them.

Parents can ruin children, and sometimes that's a learned behavior. Sometimes you can't blame your parents for it, sometimes you can. I think to me, that's what the whole paradox is, is people that have children that don't even know how to raise them.

Don't worry about how pretty (the story) sounds, how lilting it is, and the imagery, and the metaphor, all that. Most readers don't care. It's the people in your book that matter.

Look, as my mama always said, 'One monkey don't stop no show.

It's amazing how we can make ourselves believe what we want to.

It goes without saying that your friends are usually the first to discuss your personal business behind your back.

happiness aint got no Ph.D. or no certain amount of zeroes behind it!

As far as young kids go, my primary interest is to get parents to read to their kids. That’s about the most you can do, I think.

I like to think of what happens to characters in good novels and stories as knots--things keep knotting up. And by the end of the story--readers see an unknotting of sorts. Not what you expect, not the easy answers you get on TV, not wash and wear philosophies, but a reproduction of believable, emotional experiences.

People like to run their mouths.

I don't trust white critics' judgment about most things that deal with black life, particularly when a black person is the creator.

I would be content being a housewife if I could find the kind of man who wouldn't treat me like one.

It should be obvious that I wasn't no honor roll student in high school. My favorite class was boys.

I love writing in first person more than third. I have to basically suspend my own world. I don't exist. I'm just a conduit. So I can be eight years old. I can be the mother of a kid that you find out certain things I'm not going to say.

Folks want to glow, to leave their worries and dead skin behind.

If you jump to conclusions, you make terrible landings.

don't sabotage your own greatness by succumbing to failure!

Writing is the only place I can be myself and not feel judged.

I'm the only one who can stop me.. I'm the one who's been sitting at the stoplight all these years, waiting for the light to turn green.

We never thought some guy would deliberately fill our hearts with brown sugar and then pour hot water all over it.

We get divorce, we get conned, someone we love dies, or we can't find anybody to love us or somebody breaks our heart and we realize this fairy tale ain't fair. So we suffer.

Why is it that if you happen to be black and over six feet tall, everybody thinks you supposed to play basketball or football?

Writing is my shelter. I don't hide behind the words; I use them to dig inside my heart to find the truth.

I remember the day I turned thirty. I was getting out of the shower and I stood in front of the mirror and stared at myself for a long time. I examined every inch of my body and appreciated the fact that I finally looked like a grown woman. I also assumed that this was how I was going to look for the rest of my life. The way I saw it, I was never going to age; I'd just look up one day and be old.

Back then I confused passions and orgasms with love. It look me years to realize the two weren't synonymous.

money does not guarantee happiness or peace of mind, it can take your mind off things, distract you, but it can't replace the generic stuff a person needs!

My mama taught me that anything worth doing in life should be a little scary.

It's not that marriage itself is bad; it's the people we marry who give it a bad name.

I want to push the fast-forward button until I get back to happy.

Being a lifetime wife and mother has afforded me the luxury of having multiple careers: I've been a teacher. A chauffeur. A chef. An interior decorator. A landscape architect, as well as a gardener. I’ve been a painter. A personal shopper. An accountant and a banker. I’ve been a beautician. Santa Claus. The Tooth Fairy. A movie reviewer. A nurse. A psychologist. A negotiator. An I have a Ph. D in How to Pretend Like You Don’t Mind.

I been saying it for years: church is full of sneaky men posing as honest souls, and they are perpetuators our here looking for women just like you, with giant holes in your hearts, and they can smell when you got a good job and when you lonely as hell.

life is like a jigsaw puzzle, you have to see the whole picture, then put it together piece by piece!

I'd crack up without my music. It's the best company you can have, really. It don't say 'no' or 'maybe,' or ask no questions.

Pay attention to the things that agitate you. It will tell you a lot about yourself.

I let my characters do the talking, simple as that.