Classical music is a genre of music. It's no more complex or less complex than pop music or R&B. The elitism is weird.
The derision comes from snobbery, which I think is the worst thing for art and music. I don't think there's any place for it and it comes from insecurity.
Shades of Grey. I haven't read it yet, but what you have to read carefully, is “Story of O” by the French writer Dominique Aury. This is actually the forerunner of all the whole SM novels and it's really good. You have to read it.