Top 102 Quotes & Sayings by Vic Reeves

I don't really like British comedy.

Journalists like to invent a person, and it's not necessarily the person that they're writing about. The image the tabloids try to create of me and Bob is very different from how we really are. They try to make us out to be mad jokers. But I wouldn't want to put journalists down. That's their job.

I've got an incredibly acute sense of smell, like a bloodhound. My wife borrows perfumes off me. I play the bass, too.

I'm in my studio at 6 A.M. every day because I work better in the morning. Then in the afternoon, I like to go for a walk. I enjoy going for a perambulation or a constitutional. It's all very Victorian.

I cook every day and find it really relaxing. I've got a huge amount of cookery books. It's usually traditional British and French cooking, but then I'll go off-piste.

I think somewhere along the line probably Tony Hancock did an interview and claimed that he was terribly depressed, and that he was hiding his depression with comedy. So then it's been used as a template for every comedian since.

I have a look for everything I do. No matter what I do, I try to dress the part. In the garden, I'd wear vintage Levi's, because they do a thick corduroy trouser and mine have got patches on them. So I'd wear them. And a tweed jacket. The full look.

I can watch dramas all day long. I like 'Ozark,' things like that.That or 'Coronation Street.' I never miss it.

I sometimes wish I was a bit younger.

I think there's an incredible luck or skill for a 45-year-old man to draw like a three-year-old.

Once you become public, then whatever you do is public.

I love clothes and going to supermarkets. I spend hours walking around the aisles looking at ingredients.

People like to be voyeuristic and look at others bickering. That's part of any double act, from Laurel and Hardy onwards.

People think I'm a keen birdwatcher, but I don't go out of my way to look at birds. I'm not Bill Oddie. But I do know which are which. I keep my eyes open.

I've always been an early riser. Sometimes, I wake up at 4 A.M. and don't go back to sleep... My mind keeps churning out ideas. I have a notebook beside my bed.

My playground growing up was the fields and forests.

You hear rumours of some double-acts who can't stand each other. That can't be true. You couldn't do it.

You treat your body with the disrespect that you did as a young man and it starts catching up.

I'm not convinced that creative people have mentors because that's what makes them different; they just do their own thing. If anyone had tried to tell me how to go about something, I'd have run a mile. But I have certainly had a few influences in my life.

I love pineapple. You know, pineapple's great on ham, and just on its own, and in a drink. It's a very versatile fruit.

The thing is hats don't really suit me because my head's too big, so I always just end up looking like an idiot. So I tend not to wear hats.

Probably the biggest influence on me, strange though it may sound, was the 70s, a decade of invention. Growing up then had a huge impact on me. People wanted to experiment and were hungry for change. I was influenced by the literature and art of the time; listening to John Peel and Annie Nightingale and watching 'Monty Python.'

I paint or sketch for two, three hours every day. It keeps me sane.

There's not really a gap between my comedy and my art; it's all the same thing.

Comedy and art go hand in hand, even if it's not laugh-out-loud.

I couldn't ever stand up in front of an audience on my own and talk to them. It would be awful; I couldn't bear to do it.

I have topiary.

I came up with the Vic Reeves character for a stage project and people presume that's my name, even when I do other acting jobs.

When people say you can and can't say things, I don't know who's the authority on it. As long as you're kind, as long as you're not upsetting anyone. But that's a natural thing, isn't it? I would never do anything if I thought it was going to upset anyone.

A lot of things we take for granted sprang out of the 70s; it was a decade for thought and if a decade can be a mentor, then the 70s was mine.

I've been accident-prone since I was a kid climbing trees and falling out. I've come off a few motorcycles.

I've got two pigs, which doesn't constitute a farm. I just keep them in a field. They are very pleasant.

If we tried to analyse our comedy, we might stop being any good at it.

You never, ever leave art school. It's important to keep finding inspiration. I look at YouTube videos and think, 'How would I do that?' I like experimenting with things. For instance, drying paintings off too quickly in a microwave can look strangely beautiful.

I like to keep myself to myself. I like to stay in my house.

It was good fun being a pop singer. I had quite a laissez-faire attitude towards it which I think is why it worked.

What's that one that people seem to like so much? 'Fleabag.' I watched that and it was that sort of Oxbridge 'Oh, I'm so clever and witty, aren't I?' I don't like that stuff. But then I don't like 'Mrs Brown's Boys' either. I like things that are clever but hide it.

We've never gone mainstream. Once you've been around on TV for 10 years, people will assume that you're mainstream because they recognise you.

I always wear ladies' scents. I like the smell of flowers and men's scents tend to smell like burnt photocopiers.

I mean, when we did 'Families At War,' on Saturday night prime time, people said we were mainstream then. But it wasn't in the least mainstream. The fact that we got that on BBC1 at that time with those ridiculous things, that's as mainstream as we get. We do what we do and people can think that it's mainstream or avant-garde.

I can't stand dogs.

In the 70s I started doing my Big Night Out on stage when I was at art school. A friend of mine owned a comedy club and sold it to me. I worked out quite quickly that if I did the comedy myself I'd make more money.

I suffer from bizarre dreams and epic nightmares.

I am really trying not to eat cheese at night. It's become a real problem and I have now got high cholesterol. I have to do something about it.

Out Demons Out' by the Edgar Broughton Band is a good album, and they had fantastic hair - so much that you couldn't see their faces at all. But the most triangular haircut in rock belonged to Mick Box, guitarist in Uriah Heep. He had that thick, slightly curly hair that was so dense it was out in a huge triangle by the time it got to his waist.

The comedy I do on TV came from me being at art school and seeing Gilbert and George films, thinking they were hilarious. I was trying to do that, a sketch version of art, and it ended up on TV.

I like to produce something every day. The easiest way to get ideas out is to put them on paper. I like to sit back at the end of every day and think, 'I created that today.'

If we started thinking, 'Why's this funny?' we might start incorporating rules into it. I'd be suspicious that it would change the nature of what we do.

I do one painting per day, I've always done that.

I love seeing people create.

If anything had happened to Bob, I wouldn't have carried on. Me and Bob are a comedy unit.

The majority of people probably think that Damien Hirst is avant-garde. Look at the amount of people who say 'What is this rubbish? Who is running our galleries? Why are they spending all this money on the avant-garde?' That doesn't make it avant-garde to me.

Well, I wouldn't say I am a keen gardener... I'm a gardener. Well, by that I mean I've got a very nice garden and have got some very good gardeners.

My mum used to paint and my dad did woodturning. We would spend our weekends at craft fairs and art galleries. That was just what we did. We were steeped in that world.

The best way to fry an egg is to let the white out so it forms a base, then drop the yellow bit in the middle.

Most of my grudges are road-based. Parking and speeding fines.

I was a pop star at one point, and I sang the 'Shaun The Sheep' theme.

Yeah, I was in a band called Trout.

I don't quite know what zany is. I think they should think of some new words.

Every day I'm in my studio - it's wooden and purpose-built at the end of our garden. It's filthy and has got paint everywhere.