Top 725 Quotes & Sayings by Will Rogers - Page 5

Ten men in our country could buy the whole world and ten million can't buy enough to eat.

That's what a Congressman or a Senator is for -- to see that too much money don't accumulate in the national Treasury.

There is one rule that works in every calamity. Be it pestilence, war, or famine, the rich get richer and poor get poorer. The poor even help arrange it.

You've got to be (an) optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be a humorist to stay one

You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people.

I'm not a member of an organized party. I'm a Democrat.

Ammunition beats persuasion when you are looking for freedom.

Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

My forefathers didn't come over on the Mayflower, but they met the boat.

I like to hear a man talk about himself because then I never hear anything, but good.

One of the evils of democracy is, you have to put up with the man you elect whether you want him or not.

The Democrats and the Republicans are equally corrupt where money is concerned. It's only in the amount where the Republicans excel.

In politics practically everything you hear is scandal, and besides, the funny thing is that the things they are whispering ain't half has bad as the things they have been saying right out loud.

You must never tell a thing. You must illustrate it. We learn through the eye and not the noggin.

The greatest loss of time is delay and expectation. I never yet talked to the man who wanted to save time who could tell me what he was going to do with the time he saved.

An economist is a man that can tell you...what can happen under any given condition, and his guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's too.

You know, a Communist's whole life work is based on complaint of how everything is done.... So if they ever get their country running good they will defeat their own cause.

This would be a great world to dance in if we didn’t have to pay the fiddler.

There are three types of men in the world. One type learns from books. One type learns from observations. And one type just has to urinate on the electric fence himself.

The "Ways & Means Committee" is a committee that's supposed to find the Ways to divide up the Means.

A country can get more real joy out of just hollering for their freedom than they can if they get it.

Outside of traffic, there is nothing that has held this country back as much as committees.

There's the one thing no nation can ever accuse us of and that is secret diplomacy. Our foreign are an open book, generally a check book.

You could transfer Congress over to run Standard Oil or General Motors, and they would have both things bankrupt in two years.

I don't think either one of them knows what it's all about, to be honest with you. Both sides are doing nothing but just looking towards the next election.

One way to solve the traffic problem is to keep all the cars that are not paid for off the streets.

You know you've got to exercise your brain just like your muscles.

The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer.

I'm not so much interested in the return ON my money as I am in the return OF my money.

Live your life so that whenever you lose, you are ahead.

If you feel the urge, don't be afraid to go on a wild goose chase. What do you think wild geese are for anyway?

A company is known by the people it keeps.

She was so ugly she could make a mule back away from an oat bin.

Plans get you into things, but you got to work your way out.

You see, in Washington they have these bodies, Senate and the House of Representatives. That is for the convenience of the visitors. If there is nothing funny happening in one, there is sure to be in the other, and in case one body passes a good bill, why, the other can see it in time and kill it.

The best way to make a fire with two sticks is to make sure one of them is a match.

I have always claimed Americans didn't want a drink as bad as they wanted the right to take a drink if they did happen to want one.

People that pay for things never complain. It's the guy you give something to that you can't please.

We have the best Congress that money can buy.

A politician is just like a pickpocket; it's almost impossible to get him to reform.

Do anything in this world but monkey with somebody eles's religion. What reasoning of conceit makes anyone think theirs is right?

It will take America fifteen years of steady taking care of our own business and letting everybody else's alone, to get us back to where everybody speaks to us again.

Pain is such an uncomfortable feeling that even a tiny amount of it is enough to ruin every enjoyment.

You know the more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that's out always looks the best. My only solution would be to keep em both out one term and hire my good friend Henry Ford to run the whole thing, and give him a commission on what he saves us.

See where Congress passed a two billion dollar bill to relieve bankers' mistakes. You can always count on us helping those who have lost part of their fortune, but our whole history records nary a case where the loan was for the man who had absolutely nothing. Our theory is to help only those who can get along, even if they don't get a loan.

What's considered enough money? Just a little bit more.

The American people are a very generous people and will forgive almost any weakness, with the possible, exception of stupidity.

We do more talking progress than we do progressing.

In Europe public men do resign. But here it's a lost art. You have to impeach 'em.

Congress meets tomorrow morning. Let us all pray: Oh Lord, give us strength to bear that which is about to be inflicted upon us. Be merciful with them, oh Lord, for they know not what they're doing. Amen.

Politicians are just a bunch of local bandits, sent by their local voters to raid the public treasury.

There's no way in the world you're going to make a political party respectable unless you keep it out of office.

You never know how much a man can't remember until he is called as a witness.

Everyone wants to vote for the best and most qualified man, but he never runs for office.

We are the first nation in the history of the world to go to the poorhouse in an automobile.

Politicians can do more funny things naturally than I can think of to do purposely

People want just taxes more than they want lower taxes. They want to know that every man is paying his proportionate share according to his wealth.

A fanatic is always the fellow that is on the opposite side.

Nobody wants to be called common people, especially common people.

Borrowing money on what's called 'easy terms,' is a one-way ticket to the Poor House. If you think it ain't a Sucker Game, why is your Banker the richest man in your Town? Why is your Bank the biggest and finest building in your Town? Instead of passing Bills to make borrowing easy, if Congress had passed a Bill that no Person could borrow a cent of Money from any other person, they would have gone down in History as committing the greatest bit of Legislation in the World.