Top 34 Quotes & Sayings by Ryan Stiles

Explore popular quotes and sayings by an American actor Ryan Stiles.
Last updated on November 23, 2024.
Ryan Stiles

Ryan Lee Stiles is an American-Canadian actor, comedian, and producer whose work is often associated with improvisational comedy. He is best known for his work on the original British series and American version of Whose Line Is It Anyway? and for his role as Lewis Kiniski on The Drew Carey Show. He also played Herb Melnick on the CBS comedy Two and a Half Men and was a performer on the show Drew Carey's Improv-A-Ganza.

I love B.C., but you know what taxes are like in Canada.
When it comes to making love, I may not be the best, but I'm damn gouda.
On 'Whose Line,' we had six, seven, eight scenes per show, so everything was pretty quick. And there's a lot of games that we just got tired of, like 'Hats' and 'World's Worst' and 'Hoedown' and stuff.
I was into sports in high school, but I got kicked out of Richmond High at 17, so I never graduated. However, I still get invites to the class reunions... I don't know that I want to see how everyone looks now.
Back off or the lizard gets it! — © Ryan Stiles
Back off or the lizard gets it!
I'm convinced to do improv. All you have to do is listen to what people are saying to you, and then just add more information to what they've just said. That's all there is to improv, but it's the hardest thing to do.
Drew's a funny guy. Because anything he gets into, he gets in 100%. Even when we were doing 'The Drew Carey Show,' he got into bowling, and suddenly he's phoning up pros for tips and carrying around 3 balls. It's just how he does it.
I'd rather drive the yellow brick road, you wouldn't happen to know of a rental car place around.
The first rule to living in America is 'Stop tap dancing, you fool!'.
If I were as much of a man as my woman, I'd be my wife.
If I were a man with gills, I would be a fish!
If I were like your mother, I would be a woman.
I can't sprinkle sprinkles on. I lose control when I have sprinkles. I'm shaky. I still remember the great sprinkle accident of 1982.
What do I do when we're not taping? Sit in a dark room and refine my plans for someday ruling Earth from a blimp. And chess.
You know, I've got a confession to make myself. I'm not really a priest, I've just got my shirt on backwards.
I did standup for a lot of years, too, but when you come out as a standup, you get the feeling from a crowd - it's a kind of a 'make me laugh' attitude. But when you come out as an improvisor, they realize that they're suggesting everything you do. So they're already invested in the scene, and they actually want it to work.
Never interrupt me when I'm eating a banana.
I wasn't particularly funny in high school, but I grew up with three older brothers who were quite funny.
I'm going to buy some green bananas because by the time I get home they'll be ripe.
The sky, the sky beyond the door is blue.
I'm Jim Phillips, I have multiple personalities. I'm also a skindiver, a puppeteer, and I was the tenth president of the United States.
Never trust sheep.
That is raw dough. Never eat raw dough. They can make worms in your tummy. Worms in your tummy.
If I could rap, that would be a sensation, but I can't, you see, I'm just a Caucasian.
If I were but a man who would be tall, I would be me.
I cant sprinkle sprinkles on. I lose control when I have sprinkles. Im shaky. I still remember the great sprinkle accident of 1982.
Two thongs don't make a right. — © Ryan Stiles
Two thongs don't make a right.
I look like Walt Disney just threw up.
The sky, the sky beyond the door is bluuuuuuue!
I wasnt particularly funny in high school, but I grew up with three older brothers who were quite funny.
I am breathing. That's how I'm staying alive!
Quiet! I'm expressing myself!
We're expecting a lot of rain in the state of Oregon, so let's just get rid of Oregon.
The good news is your surgery was a success and now you look like a movie star! The bad news is that movie star is Drew Carey!
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