Top 539 Toilet Quotes & Sayings - Page 3
Explore popular Toilet quotes.
Last updated on November 26, 2024.
When I started as a color man in the booth with CBS, I would make footballs out of a roll of toilet paper.
People forget what a big issue toilet training is for adults and kids, and it is not fun, especially when you're in a car on the interstate.
New York, like London, seems to be a cloacina [toilet] of all the depravities of human nature.
Acting is invigorating. But I don't analyse it too much. It's like a dog smelling where it's going to do its toilet in the morning.
Can't nobody [mess] with me. I'm like toilet paper, Pampers and toothpaste. I'm definitely proven to be effective.
The octogenarians who have pictures of Hillary Clinton under their toilet-bowl covers - they've completely accepted me.
Never give an artist like me carte blanche: he would think it's simply toilet paper.
Did you ever notice that America is shaped like one big, giant toilet bowl?
If you stay in a house and you go to the bathroom and there is no toilet paper, you can always slide down the banisters. Don't tell me you haven't done it.
I cut coupons, love specials and believe in buying toilet paper and toothpaste in bulk. It's just who I am.
When I got my Oprah money, the first thing I bought was a really nice electronic bidet toilet seat.
I am proud to say that I plastic-wrapped Bruno Ricci's toilet in his trailer.
A cat is the only domestic animal I know who toilet trains itself and does a damned impressive job of it.
When I find out a hotel doesn't have a DSL, it's like "What? There's no toilet?" Once you get used to high speed you ain't going back
Well, I've thought many times when my career was in the toilet, that I was going to have to seriously consider getting another job, I don't know what I'd do.
Teddy said it was a hat, So I put it on. Now dad is saying, "where the heck's the toilet plunger gone?
Remember, if you write anything nasty about me, I'll come around and blow up your toilet.
We once installed a $1.49 trap in a woman's toilet and she never had ghost problems again.
Martin Luther dreamed up Protestantism while sitting on the toilet at Wittenburg monastery, and we know what a big movement that became.
The burden of keeping three people in toilet paper seemed to me rather a heavy one.
There’s nothing here,” Carter said. “What do you want?” I asked. “We’ve got wax, some toilet papyrus, an ugly statue.
You can draw a penguin on a toilet reading The New York Times and it's adorable, but try doing it with an adult male character, and it's disgusting.
No, Hal Needham without Burt Reynolds has not done well. 'Megaforce' went right in the toilet.
It's probably not love if you don't press your face to the toilet seat after they've used it to feel their warmth.
I was born in a house without a light or a toilet, so why would I forget who I am or where I come from?
France is a place where the money falls apart in your hands but you can't tear the toilet paper.
I live with three boys, and I can't tell you how hard it is to get your hands on toilet paper. They steal it.
I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting.
Liberals retain a totemic attachment to the Freudian idea that traumatic toilet training is destiny.
My mother always told me, 'I didn't make a perfume or go sell toilet paper. I did something good with my name.'
I'm an intense singer, so I look like I need the toilet every time I hit a high-note.
But, dear God, don't listen to me. I'm an old lady in the middle of nowhere without a real toilet.
When someone follows you all the way to the shop and watches you buy toilet roll, you know your life has changed.
You do not get gold stars for cleaning your toilet. In actual life, there is a depressing lack of stickers.
Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can't even be trusted to flush.
The chili I ate made for an explosive bathroom experience. I don't know how to put this delicately, but I missed the toilet entirely.
The humble latrine, or flush toilet, reduces disease by twice as much as just putting in clean water.
Today, the degradation of the inner life is symbolized by the fact that the only place sacred from interruption is the private toilet.
When somebody follows you 20 blocks to the pharmacy, where they watch you buy toilet paper, you know your life has changed.
In many parts of the world, more people have access to a mobile device than to a toilet or running water...
I'm like toilet paper, toothpaste and certain amenities - I'm proven to be good. I've still got 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 years left.
How can you put on a meaningful drama when every fifteen minutes proceedings are interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits with toilet paper?
I could never plan to have a career that went this well... you know, there were times when it didn't: when it went into the toilet, or ducked, or was difficult to get moving.
If we all had all we wanted to eat, we'd crap too much. We'd have inflation in the toilet paper industry.
Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet.
You know you're lazy when you run out of toilet paper and use the cardboard roll to wipe with.
I have always had a ridiculous fear that I will walk into the bathroom one morning and find a python in my toilet.
You learn a lot about people when you're sitting on their bathroom floor or on their toilet seat, rifling through their stuff.
The main part of the house is a deep red and I have butterscotch carpet. And I have a bathroom with leopard skin floor, wallpaper and toilet.
I smoke so much weed that you wouldn't believe and I get more ass then a toilet seat.
I married a man who isn't afraid to wash a dish, scrub a toilet, or have his unibrow waxed into submission by a licensed professional.
What a relief. I didn't have to check the toilet for anything or the light bulbs or the phone. It was just good old-fashioned friendship.
In many parts of the world, more people have access to a mobile device than to a toilet or running water.
Maybe I've moved to the dark side, but it's clean and nice and we never run out of toilet paper.
The miracle of modern science. The LEP pours millions into your department, Foaly, and all you can do is send Mud Boys to the toilet.
In my childhood, we had only one toilet. It was my dream then to have a good bathroom where you can have undisturbed bath.
There is only one immutable law in life - in a gentleman's toilet, incoming traffic has the right of way.
I'm horrible to live with. I don't clean. My clothes end up wherever I take them off. I forget to flush the toilet.
I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger.
