A Quote by Joan Rivers

The only way I can get a man to touch me at this age is plastic surgery. — © Joan Rivers
The only way I can get a man to touch me at this age is plastic surgery.
Honestly, depending on what stage I'm at in my life, my opinion on plastic surgery changes. I've never been against plastic surgery - I'm against bad plastic surgery. I'm against the overuse of plastic surgery.
First of all, you want to make sure you find a doctor that is a board-certified specialist in whatever that field is - whatever it is - whether it's plastic surgery, facial plastic surgery, ocular plastic surgery, brain surgery, whatever it is. And two, if they do a procedure, you want to make sure they do a lot of it.
I think women in Hollywood who don't do Botox and plastic surgery are revered. I revere them... My plan is to never go there. I'm too vain to get plastic surgery because I don't like how it looks, and I want to look my best.
I don't believe men want women to have grotesque plastic surgery or be undernourished and bony. All the plastic surgery in the world can't stop you getting older.
I'm not a big fan of plastic surgery. Because it looks like you had plastic surgery.
This Osama bin Laden, now they say he has had plastic surgery. They say he sneaked across the border into Pakistan, which by the way is the place to go to have plastic surgery. He looks great. A tourist came up to him earlier this week and said, 'May I have your autograph, Mr. Hasselhoff?'
Because I'm the only performer who comes out and says I've had plastic surgery, I've become the plastic surgery poster girl, which is hilarious, because everybody has done it and they all deny it. They stand there, like the Bride of Frankenstein, they've all got stitches, and they all say, 'I've done nothing.' I talk about it.
Of course, every time someone does a story on plastic surgery, my name will be dragged up. I've made it safe for other people to have plastic surgery. It's no longer a bad word.
[On plastic surgery:] When I die, God won't know me. There are no two parts of my body the same age.
I hate when models say 'Oh, plastic surgery is just a wrong thing. What are you talking about? You won the genetic lottery. You look like this specimen that's making people everywhere feel insecure and you're going to ridicule someone for getting plastic surgery?
I'm all for women who get plastic surgery, because plastic surgery allows you to make your outer appearance resemble your inner appearance — fakeWe have shows like Extreme Make-Over: “I don't want to develop a personality, just cut my face! Stretch it and staple it. Now I'm happy, or at least I look like it.
You can't treat an illness with cosmetic surgery, and that's why it would be great if there were qualified therapists in plastic surgeons' offices, and that people would go to a therapeutic meeting before plastic surgery. I think that should be part of the FDA requirement.
I really don't think plastic surgery is a good idea. People who've had it done don't look younger or better, they just look like they've had plastic surgery.
If I had had plastic surgery, I would have asked for something better than the face you are seeing! I actually really hate plastic surgery when it's just for aesthetics and anti-ageing. I think ageing is beautiful and expressive and characterful.
People say you shouldn't have plastic surgery because if God wanted you another way he would have made you that way, but I say that's a lot of crock. If God didn't want plastic surgeons, he wouldn't have given them hands to work with.
I'd rather look old than look as if I'd had plastic surgery. Sometimes it looks really fake; all people can think about when they look at you is that you've had plastic surgery.
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