I learned how to ski for 'Eddie the Eagle.' I never skied before. So I had to go out to Germany a couple of weeks early and make sure I could ski.
In 2012, I was invited to a ski event called the Hartford Ski Spectacular to learn how to sit-ski for the first time. I loved it, but it was not pretty - I was not good. I didn't know how to stop, so I kept throwing myself on the ground.
I had to think about ankle torsion, where the screws are on the ski, how that affects the forces going into the ski and how the ski bends, your leverage points. It was a challenge. I was having the greatest time, making the mistakes, crashing.
Some of the events in the Olympics don't make sense to me. I don't understand the connection to any reality... Like in the Winter Olympics they have that biathlon that combines cross-country skiing with shooting a gun. How many alpine snipers are into this? Ski, shoot a gun... ski, bang, bang, bang... It's like combining swimming and strangling a guy. Why don't we have that? That makes absolutely as much sense to me. Just put people in the pool at the end of each lane for the swimmers.
I learned to ski in the Dolomites at the age of five. Ski lifts didn't exist then, so I did everything on foot.
When I ski, I take both of my legs off and get into a sit ski: a ski with a custom seat that has been molded for me. I use my core and arms to propel myself on snow with help from ski poles.
I had no money, no training facilities, no snow, no ski jumps, no trainer, but I still managed to ski jump for my country - and getting there was my gold medal.
If it's cross-country ski season, I'll be out doing that, or snowshoeing up in Quebec. In my California home, I go to the local Y and I like doing yoga. It's been hugely beneficial to me in injury avoidance.
Enter with the torch in the stadium. 80,000 people screaming. I was waiting downstairs for the start for 10 hours; I was so tired with the torch. I give the torch to the combined ski cross country that they win gold in Lillehammer in 1994.
I'm a writer-director-actor, which I've always kind of enjoyed. I compared it to the Olympic biathlon. "Not only can he cross-country ski, but he's a terrific marksman as well." I want people to say, "You mean that writer performed a tracheotomy?" That's right, I do everything.
I think one of the laughable things about poor old Brexit is that they're so cross - they're furious with everyone. But this isn't a cross country; this is a generous and optimistic country.
In the Cross is salvation; in the Cross is life; in the Cross is protection against our enemies; in the Cross is infusion of heavenly sweetness; in the Cross is strength of mind; in the Cross is joy of spirit; in the Cross is excellence of virtue; in the Cross is perfection of holiness. There is no salvation of soul, nor hope of eternal life, save in the Cross.
I'm dreading being on a ski cross with other skiers who don't know what they're doing.
I learned how to stop crying. I learned how to hide inside of myself. I learned how to be somebody else. I learned how to be cold and numb.
I started going on ski trips at senior school. I can't remember exactly where but we skied in the Tirol in Austria a couple of times and also went to Val d'Isère in France. When I was 15, rugby took over and there wasn't time to ski any more. I didn't ski again until I was 33.
I'm not the fastest, not the most athletic, but I learned how to play the right way. I learned how to be a professional. I learned how to win and how to be a team-first guy.