A Quote by Mike Birbiglia

My friends drink everywhere. They even drink at the laundromat. I tried drinking at the laundromat, and I thought I was in a submarine, navigating the Sea of White Panties with my Spanish-speaking crew. I was like, "Mrs. Sanchez, set the coordinates to Permanent Press! Give me some quarters and another drink! This place is starting to look like a laundromat."

Mike Birbiglia

Quote Topics

Another Coordinates Crew Drink Drinking Even Everywhere Friends Give Give Me Like Look Me My Friends Panties Permanent Place Press Quarters Sea Set Some Spanish Speaking Starting Submarine Thought Tried White

Quote Author

Mike Birbiglia
American - Comedian
Born: June 20, 1978

I lived in a little shack in Santa Monica, and I was working on 'The O.C.' and when it started airing, I took my laundry down to the laundromat like I always had, and so many people along the two blocks I walked and in the laundromat stopped me and asked me for photographs.

Chris Carmack

I like to go to the frat house and drink with my white friends, because anytime you go drinking at the frat house, white boys bring you a drink and hand it to you like it's a top CIA secret. They'll hand me my drink, and I'll go, 'Man, what the hell is in this?' 'Dude, don't worry. Don't ask, just drink it. I'll see you in 20 minutes.' Next thing you know, I'm buck naked, standing on a coffee table, with a cowboy hat.

Aries Spears

I don't know if enjoy is the right word for alcohol. I like to drink, but I don't like enforced social drinking. When I don't wanna drink, I don't wanna drink. I haven't had a desire to drink for four months. When I think of the taste of it, no desire. The trouble is the wines I love I can barely afford, which is a great method to cut down on your drinking: Drink only what you can't afford.

Nick Tosches

in the cupboard sits my bottle like a dwarf waiting to scratch out my prayers. I drink and cough like some idiot at a symphony, sunlight and maddened birds are everywhere, the phone rings gamboling its sound against the odds of the crooked sea; I drink deeply and evenly now, I drink to paradise and death and the lie of love.

Charles Bukowski

Here, drink your liqueur," Henry said, tossing back her drink. "I carry it with me everywhere because it's the only kind of drink that Leo doesn't like, so there's a chance I'll still have some tomorrow.

Eloisa James

Drink because you are happy, but never because you are miserable. Never drink when you are wretched without it, or you will be like the grey-faced gin-drinker in the slum; but drink when you would be happy without it, and you will be like the laughing peasant of Italy. Never drink because you need it, for this is rational drinking, and the way to death and hell. But drink because you do not need it, for this is irrational drinking, and the ancient health of the world.

Gilbert K. Chesterton

I have a reputation for drinking a lot. Indeed, I drink quite much. However, I give it up when I wish to do so. I never, ever drink while on duty. The drinking is only for my pleasure. I do not remember neglecting my duties because of drinking even once.

Mustafa Kemal Ataturk

That's the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.

Charles Bukowski

I don't drink everywhere, as I am not a hard drinker. I also prefer not to drink in those parties where there is a huge gathering of people. For me, drinking is private.

Riya Sen

I came in here and a fella asked me to have a drink. I said I don't drink. Then another fella said hear you and Joe DiMaggio aren't speaking and I said I'll take that drink.

Casey Stengel

Vodka is a wonderful drink. You can drink so much of it without being as hung over as you would if you were drinking one of the brown liquors - the whiskeys and such. It's a great drink to go with appetizers.

Gary Shteyngart

When you drink fluoridated water, you're drinking liquid Prozac. You drink enough of it, even though it's a small amount, drink it for decades and decades and what does Prozac do to you? It dumbs you down; it makes you docile.

Jesse Ventura

One night, I went out with my teammates. I don't drink alcohol, so I wasn't drinking. This girl walked up to me; she was talking to me. She was like, 'Why aren't you drinking?' I was like, 'I just don't drink. Alcohol is nasty.' She said, 'I might have something for you.' She went and got a Shirley Temple. Then I was like, 'Ohhh, OK.'

Joel Embiid

My body is weird. I can't drink strong drinks. I can't even drink cough medicine - I used to cry when my mom forced me. I don't drink alcohol.

Rahim Moore

Are you there vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Please get me out of jail and I promise I will never drink again. Drink and drive. I will never drink and drive again. I may even start my own group fashioned after MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, but I'll call it AWLTDASH, Alcoholics Who Like to Drink and Stay Home.