A Quote by Stephen Colbert

I don't perceive my role as a newsman at all. I'm a comedian from stem to stern. You can cut me open and count the rings of jokes.

Stephen Colbert

Quote Topics

Comedian Count Cut Jokes Me Open Perceive Rings Role Stem Stern

Quote Author

Stephen Colbert
American - Comedian
Born: May 13, 1964

Anyone can cut an apple open and count the number of seeds. But, who can look at a single seed and count the trees and apples?

Dottie Walters

I had a moment where I was onstage once... As a comedian, you just think, 'Be funny as possible all the time - like, funny at all costs - jokes, jokes, jokes.' That's how my mentality was.

Whitney Cummings

The jokes are great but what really matters for a comedian is his performance, his whole attitude, and the laughs that he gets between the jokes rather than on top of the jokes.

Jack Dee

Once I started to get aligned with the God in me, something hit me hard: I learned that our worth, our validation, our purpose and our acceptance don't stem from what we should do. They don't stem from what we have. They don't stem from what we've done or who we were. They stem simply from the fact that we are.

Grace Gealey

The STEM fields play an increasingly important role in the U.S. economy, but women are still underrepresented in most STEM sectors.

Elizabeth Esty

Grandma, how old is she?" "Oh I don't know." Grandma said. "You'd have to cut off her head and count the rings in her neck.

Richard Peck

I'm more of an older school comedian so Tommy Davidson still makes me laugh a lot no matter how many times I've heard his jokes or not. He's just an animated comedian that I don't mind seeing over and over again.

Joe Torry

I shuddered from stem to stern, as stout barks do when buffeted by the waves.

P. G. Wodehouse

I think I have got a lot better as an interviewer. I let people talk now which is something you need to do. At the beginning I thought jokes, jokes, jokes, I am a stand up comedian but I think I have mellowed out now.

Alan Carr

Brilliantly lit from stem to stern, she looked like a sagging birthday cake.

Walter Lord

I realize how desperate it sounds for me, as a comedian, to ask you to laugh at my jokes.

John Oliver

What I enjoy most about 'The Lord of the Rings' is that extended cut. To be able to sit there on a Sunday afternoon and watch 'The Lord of the Rings' from beginning to end is pretty fun.

Lee Pace

Not everything that counts can be counted. You can count sales. You can count fans and followers. You can count pins and tweets. But you can't count passion. You can't count commitment. You can't count engagement. You can't count relationships.

John Kremer

We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.

Fred Allen

I have too many guys that count on me as a coach so in 2009 you're going to see me in a lot of cages and rings but I'll only be in them to corner my fighters.