A Quote by Alesha Dixon
Anyone who walks out on stage, whether he's eight or 80, they'll go, 'Oh, Alesha, he'd be good for you.' I'm the butt of the single jokes.
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Whether there's 100 people or 100,000, we bring our 'A' game every single time. We're full-speed on stage. We kick the audience's butt.
I always thought I was a good person, a decent person. I never harassed anyone or touched anyone. And you say to yourself , 'Oh, that's good enough,' but yes, I had certain jokes that I always assumed the audience would understand. This is Persona.
I think my one of my strengths in standup is my ability to adlib. I do all my best writing on stage. I can sit down and write jokes, but I'd rather go on stage with a premise or an idea and let the jokes come that way. My creative juices are never flowing any better than when I'm onstage.
Nobody cares what anyone did last year, whether you were good, whether you were bad, everybody has ambitions and aspirations for this year. But it really doesn't matter until you go out there and prove it and you go out there and do it.
We decided to have the baby at home because we wanted it to be a natural birth, and it turns out that it was 30 hours of natural. Eight hours of pushing - that's the part that men don't understand. Women go, 'Oh, dear, oh, dear God, eight hours of pushing?' And the men are like, 'Okay, eight hours of pushing.'
Sometimes I see myself in the mirror, and it's 'Oh, God!' But the minute you stick out your butt a little bit and suck it in, you go from a 6 to a 10.
I don't get up, get dressed, go out, and think, 'Okay, I gotta find eight jokes.'
It seemed fun to play a villain on stage and I wanted my jokes to be so good that I could just calmly tell them on stage.
Discipline allows you to trade effectively. You can take your ego out of it. You can go wrong 60, 70% of the time and still make a lot of money. If you ignore the discipline of managing risk, you have to be right 80% of the time or more, and I don't know anyone who's that good.
The next morning I woke up at oh eight oh oh hours, my brothers, and as I still felt shagged and fagged and fashed and bashed and my glazzies were stuck together real horrorshow with sleepglue, I thought I would not go to school.
If something is good, it doesn't go out of style every six months. The fashion wheel of today doesn't have to go as quickly as it was pushed in the 80's.
When I was a kid we'd go and visit my grandmother, and my dad is one of eight so they'd all be sitting there updating everyone on the good things but also on the fact that so and so had cancer or had lost their job, and people would make jokes.
People would say, "Oh, you say you just do jokes." I don't just do jokes. I do jokes. Jokes are important. They saved my life when I was younger. Hopefully we're making things nicer at the end of the day for people. That's the entire goal, and that's the touchstone and the North Star for the tone.
We are always going to be influenced by America... I watched the word 'bum' go out and 'butt' come in. And part of me says, oh that's a shame, but Aussie boys are still Aussie boys.
Oh, me? I'm not 80% water. I'm 80% coffee, and a little bit of sass.
I take a subject, then I go on stage, and whatever is in there comes out. You can edit as you go and continue to work it out on stage until it's something you like, but I never think about it. I just go up and flow.
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