A Quote by Amandla Stenberg
The most important lesson I've learned is to not limit myself. Kids at my age often get intimidated by the idea of adulthood and feel like they have to know exactly who they are and what they want to do with their lives. I've realized that it's okay to take my time figuring it out and exploring different aspects of myself instead of fixating on one idea of who I am.
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I would say where I feel like I'm struggling the most in learning and giving myself permission to fail is in finding the balance in life. There are different aspects to women: there's the mother, there's the working woman, there's the wife, the friend, the sister, the daughter and so just figuring that all out. I continue to want to try new things and give myself permission to not be great at it.
I'm at a period in my life when I'm figuring out my idea of who I am and what I want and how to hold onto love -- all that big stuff. And I'm starting to realize that it can happen at any age. I know people who are in their 50s who are figuring out what they want and who they are, and I think it's great. It's like you're always approaching life as a beginner.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned is, “It’s okay.” It’s okay for me to be kind to myself. It’s okay to be wrong. It’s okay to get mad. It’s ok to be flawed. It’s okay to be happy. It’s okay to move on.
I like the idea of teaching kids how to lose. That's a really important lesson in life. I don't like the idea of doing leadline where everyone gets a blue ribbon. I think it's unrealistic for kids and teaches the wrong lesson.
During my career as a standup and actor, I realized it was very frustrating for me to get hired because Hollywood was hiring a different kind of brother, you know, and I was doing political humor... In order for me to really have a long career, I'm going to have to learn how to write and produce for myself... I had no idea I was really going to like it and I'm very fortunate to be successful. But the idea was to always eventually create something for myself. That was the idea from the beginning when I went into writing and producing.
I turned 25. And I don't feel like... whatever, age is just a number. I still feel very young and excited about life and everything. For the first time ever I began to take a look at life and really value it, and realize that there are so many things that I want to do; travel, I want to see the world. I realized that I want to take more time for myself and take more time to see the world and spend time with friends. That sounds so basic but I never really realized that before.
I think I did realize that early on, and then I went through a fun phase where I was figuring out who I was and the different sides of myself. I think like most women, I bought into a certain ideal of beauty that I didn't quite fit into, and I tried to pretzel myself and alter myself to be what I was told is beautiful, and then I realized that you are in control of what you think is beautiful.
When I'm meditating on an idea, I try to let the idea completely saturate me to the point where I feel like I'm covering myself in it or totally immersing myself in it, so that everywhere I'm looking, everywhere I'm going, it's through the lens of that idea. And that's sort of what I do with the music - I try to lose myself in it.
For me, that's the most important thing, feel myself happy when I am playing. If I am healthy and I feel myself competitive, I am happy. Then is obvious I would like to win. But I know if I am in finals of important events, the normal thing is I finally win titles.
I've also learned to no longer feel guilty if I'm invited out and don't want to go. If I start to say to myself, 'What's wrong with you that you're staying in five nights in a row to watch 'Forensic Files' instead of going out with your friends' I remind myself that it's what I need to do for myself at that point.
When I travel with my kids abroad, I am not myself, but I'm more a father who wants to protect them. Sometimes, I am even aggressive about certain things and get surprised seeing myself like that: for instance, when people want to take pictures of them. I am fine if they want to take my pictures, but they are not public property.
As we age, there are different things that become important to us and that means that different aspects of our character come to the forefront; certain aspects recede. And that's fun. It would be shitty to have to imitate myself.
I am interested in all aspects of filmmaking, so I have an opinion on every aspect, so sound design, score, cinematography, editing - all that stuff I have experience doing myself, so I had a very strong idea of what I wanted, and I got, for the most part, people that were able to articulate that idea, which was nice.
I'm not twentysomething. I'm not trying to find myself - I know exactly who I am and exactly what I want. And I don't want a fan. I want a man who understands me, who challenges me, who calls me on my sh-t instead of letting me get away with it because I'm supposed to be a star. I want a best friend.
[Photographer Julian Wasser] had this great idea that I should play chess naked with Marcel Duchamp and it seem to be such a great idea that it was just like the best idea I'd ever heard in my life. It was like a great idea. I mean, it was - Not only was it vengeance, it was art, and it was, like, a great idea. And even if it didn't get any vengeance, it would still turn out okay with me because, you know, I would be sort of immortalized.
My toughest fight was myself. For me to disclose and let things out was not easy because we don't want to seem weak or like we are different, but I learned that it's okay.
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