A Quote by Annie E. Clark
I know that, physically, I'm a very demure-looking person. But I certainly have as much aggression or anger as the next person, and that's got to come out somehow. I'm lucky that I get to play music, and that it's not going to come out in some totally destructive way.
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Looking back on it, now I can identify the points in my life when I wasn't playing, and music - and didn't have that outlet - those were the points when I was most unguided and self destructive because I didn't have that channel to get those energies out. I'm a much healthier person when I play music.
If you're serious about singing or acting, which are two art forms that get repetitive, the way to keep the music fresh is to recognize that it is totally impossible for it to ever be the same, night after night. You open your mouth and you'd like a certain sound to come out of it, but it doesn't always come out exactly like you thought it was going to come out!
The old idea is that when tragedy strikes or when an obstacle blocks us, there are only two possibilities. We either become a smaller person or we become a bigger person. If it's a real life change you cannot come out the same. So therefore, you're either going to come out smaller or you're going to rise up and ultimately come out of it a bigger person.
Going to my shows, it's like a religious experience, because you come out, you go in one person, you come out a different person.
I can make films. And some of them come out good, and some of them come out better, and some of them come out worse. But I've been very lucky over the years to be able to sustain the length of career that I've had.
People have so many expectations when they go out on stage, so many wishes about what their night is going to be: if they're going to meet that person, have a fun time with their friends, have a good high, hear good music. People get drunk and turn into themselves in a way, and they go to experience some kind of emotion. But it's not always about fun. There's a destructive side to it. But I'm more into the empowerment of going out, because it's always been the place where I could be myself and get inspired. Even if I'm sad, dancing is a way to let stuff out.
You can pretend everything's fine, but if there's an unhappiness or you're not having sex or you're not communicating or you're made to feel third best in the house and you don't address it and you just try to put on a nice face and a smile, that kind of aggression and anger is going to come out in some sinister way.
I'm a pretty easygoing person, and it bleeds into the music. Even if I'm writing the most personal song, it's not going to come out totally serious; there's always a little tongue in the cheek.
Every time I got drunk, this girl named Nikki would show up. When I got drunk, I was just a different person. This is a totally different person than Lisa. When these two started to battle it out, I had to create a third person to come in and straighten the two of them out. Nina, my evil twin who came from within, who I blame my sins on. (satanic alter) All the problems I did have stemmed from what I was doing - I was creating all these different personalities.
Not one person from the music world has ever come with - as if I could get a rock'n'roller up at four in the morning to play golf - but that's fine. I have way too much going on to sit around waiting for tee time at two in the afternoon.
When conversion takes place, the process of revelation occurs in a very simple way - a person is in need, he suffers, and then somehow the other world opens up. The more you are in suffering and difficulties and are 'desperate' for God, the more He is going to come to your aid, reveal Who He is and show you the way out.
I wanted to go into prison and come out a better person - mentally, physically. So, I read a lot of books, got my GED while I was in there, and worked out every day. Strong body, strong mind.
It can be hard to keep that mentality but I know that to play your best you can't be worrying about getting dropped, because then you just go into your shell even more and play safe. I've just got to come out and play how I know I can play - that's the way that you get the best out of yourself.
If you don't find some way to discuss what's going on inside you, it can come out in other ways that are self-destructive.
When you play the Oakland Raiders when you're the Kansas City Chiefs, you know they're going to come out with that mentality that they're going to win. They're going to come out fighting. It's a rivalry game.
I'm always producing with the idea that the music is representing one person. That could play a factor in the intimacy of it. I'm always producing for that one person, never for a group of people - especially if it's non-danceable. I'm always thinking that one person's going to listen to this and that person might want to feel a certain way at a certain time. That can be out in space, it can be at the bus stop, it can be laying in bed listening to music. I look at it as if I'm whispering in someone's ear, basically.
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