A Quote by Beyonce Knowles
I've had small depressions, days when I've woken up and felt sad, especially when I'm so far away from home. I've got my religion and that is my therapy, although I think it would be good for me to have someone I can talk to. But I have friends. I haven't got a therapist but maybe I should.
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As I got warmed up, and felt perfectly at home in talk, I heard myself boasting, lying, exaggerating. Oh, not deliberately, far from it. It would be unconvivial and dull to stop and arrest the flow of talk, and speak only after carefully considering whether I was telling the truth.
I got on a plane. I remember when I got on the plane, the talk was, you know, they're checking Dale out, that it's more than what it looked like, but I still didn't think it would be anything more than maybe some injuries. Then I landed at home and my phone just lit up. I started getting those messages.
I mean, I was blown away. I couldn't believe it. I was just in shock.
I'm never sad when a friend goes far away, because whichever city or country that friend goes to, they turn the place friendly. They turn a suspicious-looking name on the map into a place where a welcome can be found. Maybe the friend will talk about you sometimes, to other friends that live around him, and then that's almost as good as being there yourself. You're in several places at once! In fact, my daughter, I would even go so far as to say that the further away your friends, and the more spread out they are the better your chances of going safely through the world.
Honestly, I never needed a mask to go onstage. It was me who was there, and it was always what I felt, based on what I had learned at home, in my religion, and from society. I clung to that: 'This is me, it has to be me.' And if I had an encounter with someone of the same sex, I looked away.
If you have trouble with finding things you should get into some kind of therapy with a good therapist if you need, I mean I just believe in therapy for everybody. I really do. I don't think any body can escape it.
All of my friends were seeing a therapist, and I thought something was wrong with me that I didn't see a therapist. So I went to a therapist to find out why I wasn't seeing a therapist. And it turns out I'm very screwed up. Thank God I found a therapist to tell me for $125 an hour.
I had some pretty lucky and good living situations; thankfully I never got forced out of an apartment. A lot of my friends got evicted or pushed out and couldn't afford a new place. For me, I wanted more space to set up a home studio, but there was no way to afford that.
Every song I've written, it's about what I've gone through, good or bad. It kind of comes out of me, and I'm grateful for that. I've got friends who are back home who've got no way to express that, and they're kind of in a different position in life. It's alarming to me that I've written something on my bedroom floor when I was 19 or something, and then there's 50,000 people that know the words, and they've got a similar feeling. If you thought about it too much, your head would blow up.
If I had grown earlier, maybe I would have stuck with football. Maybe. But I was just too small. I was quick, I could outrun people, but if anyone ever got a hand on me, I was done.
I got 'Scandal,' and that was, far and away, the biggest deal that had happened in my career. Simultaneously, the stress from planning my wedding and being in the public eye for the first time, combined with genetics - I got the diagnosis that I had psoriasis, and I was completely embarrassed and ashamed. I felt like a lesser person.
I have a terrible problem with procrastination. A friend told me, "Well, you should go to therapy." And I thought about it, but then I said, "Wait a minute. Why should I pay a stranger to listen to me talk when I can get strangers to pay to listen to me talk?" And that's when I got the idea of touring.
I talk to a lot of European coaches. I got friends over there that I steal stuff from, talk to, maybe have them look at what we're doing and say, 'Hey, what would you do differently?'
It would be easy for someone to think growing up in a small town would be like 'Footloose' or something, that it would be, 'No dancing allowed!' all the time, but it was quite the opposite. People always got excited for me and my successes and supported me even though I was a little weirdo goofball.
But all three of them had had to lose things in order to gain other things. Will had lost his shell and his cool and his distance, and he felt scared and vulnerable, but he got to be with Rachel; and Fiona had lost a big chunk of Marcus, and she got to stay away from the casualty ward; and Marcus had lost himself, and got to walk home from school with his shoes on.
I was full of energy, and I had a lot of bottled up rage that would come out in my stage performances. It was therapy sessions for someone who couldn't afford to go to therapy, a way to release my frustration, my inhibition. When I was little, growing up in an abusive household, I felt like I didn't have a voice. Suddenly I was on stage and people were watching me and listening to me, so even if I was singing about something that didn't have to do with abuse, when I was on stage I could express all of the anger, the rage.
Goodbye to my friends at home, goodbye to people I've trusted. I've got to go out and make my way, I might get rich, you know I might get busted. But my heart keeps calling me backwards, as I get on the 707. Ridin' high, I got tears in my eyes, you know you got to go through hell before you get to heaven. Big ol' jet airliner, don't carry me too far away. Big ol' jet airliner, 'cause it's here that I've got to stay.
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