A Quote by Bill Bailey
Three blokes go into a pub. Something happens. The outcome was hilarious!
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Three blokes go into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.
Joke number 1, I have a bit of a problem with jokes, bit of a handicap for a comedian obviously, um, I tend to bail out of the joke, I lose commitment in it, I'll give you an example: Three blokes go into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.
Good big blokes are better than good little blokes. Then again, good little blokes are better than dud big blokes. And dud big blokes should play something other than Rugby
I am much more happy in a country pub with 10 blokes having a pint than going to a night club.
I go from pub to pub, or jumping on buses or stopping cars. I don't need a TV audience. Every time I go naked, all of a sudden TV cameras pop up around me.
You may have an overall target to achieve with each prospect, but if you are going to have an ideal outcome for each call, should you not also have a tolerable outcome to fall back on? Something you are willing to put up with if things don't go completely to plan, but something that still moves things forward ever so slightly?
Usually there will be a funny trend that I put my own twist on or something hilarious happens to me and I think - 'This would be a perfect TikTok.'
Losing one final, that happens, but when it happens three times in a row, that is something else entirely.
We were never a band that did 96 takes of the same thing. I had heard of groups that were into that kind of excess around that time. They'd work on the same track for three or four days and then work on it some more, but that's clearly not the way to record an album. If the track isn't happening and it creates some sort of psychological barrier, even after an hour or two, then you should stop and do something else. Go out: go to the pub, or a restaurant or something. Or play another song.
It’s been a very old thing for people to gather together and laugh at stuff. The first comedian in America really was Abraham Lincoln. He used to go to a pub near where he lived and stand in front of the fire and he packed the place every night and he would just talk and bust everybody in their guts. He was just a hilarious speaker and that’s what he did.
On moral grounds, I think that if you believe a certain outcome is a very possible outcome, you have an obligation to tell people that. With global warming, the probability of a bad outcome if we stay on our current emission trends is incredibly high. If you know a bad outcome is likely to happen, what right do you have not to communicate that? You go into a doctor's office, what are they going to do - not tell you the diagnosis?
You either create something there on the street, or nothing happens. It's brutal. But if you go through that for two or three years, it really toughens you up.
I have learned from my mistakes... the business we are in is cutthroat. I have seen too many older blokes give their all for clubs, then be told they are not wanted. Even blokes still on contract are told to look elsewhere.
When you're making a movie, you don't think about the outcome. That's something I'm grateful for: whenever I go and do a new project, I never think about the outcome. It's always just about the work at hand. That's the fun part. The other part is always something I've had a struggle with, which is promoting the film. I know it's important.
I think it's better if blokes can admit that they can have crushes on other blokes. I've probably had crushes but never really sexual crushes on men.
I think it's hilarious at 40 years old to bring out my roller skates from 'Starlight Express.' I find the humor and even the sadness in it hilarious and something to celebrate.
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