A Quote by Bill Engvall

You know your getting older when you lay in bed til 10am and think to yourself god I just wasted half the day. — © Bill Engvall
You know your getting older when you lay in bed til 10am and think to yourself god I just wasted half the day.
It's never been about trying to look well-behaved. It's just how I am. I guess it's a weird thing to be 19 and not ever have been drunk, but for me, it just feels normal because I don't really know any other way. I don't know if I'd be comfortable getting wasted and not knowing what I've said. That doesn't mean when I'm older I won't have a glass of wine. I just don't think it's such a strange thing for me not to be wasted all the time.
Half the struggle is just getting yourself to the gym or getting yourself in your workout gear and ready for action.
The older you get, the more fragile you understand life to be. I think that's good motivation for getting out of bed joyfully each day.
I think the older you get, the more you know about life, and the more you learn about yourself and you become comfortable in your own skin. So the older I'm getting, the more fun I'm having.
Don't blink. You just might miss your babies growing like mine did. Turning into moms and dads next thing you know your 'better half' Of fifty years is there in bed. And you're praying God takes you instead. Trust me friend a hundred years goes faster than you think So don't blink.
I feel like when you're in your late teens and early 20s, you just don't think about certain things in your life, and as you get older, you think about your parents getting older.
I know that half of my advertising dollars are wasted ... I just don't know which half.
One thing I’ve noticed about getting older, it takes twice as much work to get half the results one formerly achieved by falling out of bed.
I think the way you prevent your man from cheating on you is to just have a good understanding about who he is first. If you know that the guy you're with is a player and he's already kind of living the life, you know what you're getting yourself into. You have to be real with yourself.
I think Saturday may be Latin for "stay in pajamas til noon then eventually motivate yourself to shower and get ready for bed that night.
When your alarm goes off and you jump out of bed, what is the nature of the mind in that moment? Are you already like, "oh my God," your calendar pops into your mind and you're driven already, or can you take a moment and just lie in bed and just feel your body breathing. And remember, "oh yeah, brand new day and I'm still alive." So, I get out of bed with awareness, brush my teeth with awareness. When you're in the shower next time check and see if you're in the shower.
My worst year. The only thing that I know for a fact now is that if it's really a bad day, then I draw the curtains, and I lay in bed. There is no way of dealing with grief. And I have no idea. This year I had double of them, my mother and my husband. I just take it one day at a time.
On my off day, I really want to just lay in bed.
Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is I don't know which half. Advertising is the most fun you can have with your clothes on.
POSSIBLE OPENERS AFTER YOU'VE GOTTEN DRUNK AND SLEPT IN YOUR GUY ROOMMATE'S BED (A LIST):1. Hey, Drew, thanks for letting me sleep in your bed. I hope I didn't puke all over your sheets.2. What do you mean? I slept in your bed? Really? I don't remember any of it, I was so wasted.3. Thanks for not trying to molest me.
I don't know how many times I heard older people, and not just parents but just older people, say, 'Oh, my God. Your generation is just totally nuts. You have no sense of what it was really like, when it was great.' And every generation has that same feeling, you know?
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