A Quote by Bill Engvall
I swear to you, I am the cheapest drunk on the planet. It takes nothing to get me loopy and doing stupid stuff. Yeah. Some of you like that? Well... like riding an electric floor buffer for a shot of tequila. Did it!
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I like doing this stuff [stunts] though, it's kind of the whole reason that you want to do the movie. When you're reading it you're like, "Oh, I get to dive out a window? Cool! I get to jump off a building? Great!" So I love doing that stuff, it's like the stuff we used to do in high school to be stupid and fun.
I like to go dancing, have a few beers. I like being alone, too. I have days where it's 'God, get me a shot of tequila.'
People are sometimes like: "Oh man, you're so talented and you do a bunch of stuff." I'm not! I swear to god, I'm not. I just like learning stuff, I like doing stuff. And I feel like everybody can definitely do it.
My first film I made, "Permanent Vacation," we shot in 1979 for like $12,000, part of which I got a fake car loan for that Amos Poe told me you could do that. And, yeah, I had no idea what I was doing. It was just like, well, we're going to try and do this. Partly because I had been following Amos Poe and Eric Mitchell around for about a year, and I worked on some of Eric's films as a sound recordist and stuff.
For a shot, I had to look like I've slipped on wet floor and hurt my back. My director wanted me to just act it out, but I insisted on doing it with water on the floor to make it look authentic. He was against the idea, but I did it and almost broke my back.
I confessed to Mike [Cimino] a couple of days before we shot. I was like, "What am I doing here, Mike?" And Mike just looked at me, in that very directorial manor, took a long pause, and he said, "You know the game tag?" And I said, "Yeah." And he said, "Well, you're it." That was some of the best direction I think I've ever received.
Most of my fans know I love video games. I say it in every interview, so they know. But one thing that I like doing is skateboarding, I like jet skiing, skydiving. It's like a huge roller coaster ride. Like forty seconds of free-falling. That's some of the stuff I love, daredevil stuff. I like horseback riding.
So I tried to get my shot with a 50mm and I did it - this is when we're shooting film, not digital. The guy that hired me looked through the pictures and was like, "Oh, this is pretty good. You did a good job." And I was like, "Yeah, I'm sorry. I only had a 50mm. My girlfriend rented the wrong lens..." and he stopped looking at the pictures and he looked up at me and he said, "You shot this with a 50mm? You're hired."
I found out some of the spots on the floor that I like to shoot - do my little floater shots, my pull-up shots, being able to get all the way to the rim. By me doing that, it's kind of opened up my 3-point shot.
Yeah, I'm doing some stuff behind the camera. Producing and directing. I feel like my face has been on TV enough in my lifetime that people don't need to see me like that anymore.
Lust tastes like tequila and love tastes like whiskey. Love burns for longer and warms you up on the inside and sometimes it makes you do stupid things. Tequila makes you wasted.
We made some mistakes. We had some managers we didn't like and had to get rid of, and that cost some money. Stuff like that. But overall, we did really well.
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
I'd go to a more civil party just to socialize, and I didn't know what to do with myself. So I drank a shot of tequila. And then I drank another one. I probably had four or five shots. I was like, "Tequila! It wakes you right up!" But no.
People come to me with ideas for shows, and I certainly am thinking of stuff all the time. And it's always like, you know, "Get high and drive a car!" Or "Get high and do this or that." It's always things like, "Well, that's a terrible idea to get high and do that." So, when they came to me with this, I was like, "Well, you're just sitting there and discussing cases."
Something like 'Without a Paddle' does really well at the box office and I'm like, 'Oh, here we go.' In 'Without a Paddle' I'm the romantic lead - great! A comedy and that's what America wants. Then it did nothing for me and I went into kind-of a work abyss. I just didn't get another shot.
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