A Quote by Bill Maher

The Bible looks like it started out as a game of Mad Libs. — © Bill Maher
The Bible looks like it started out as a game of Mad Libs.
I just feel like I have when I started making a lot of money, I started spreading it out to people. Mickelson, the whole deal, the over-tip: if I see a guy that looks like he needs a hand out or something, I'll pull something out and give him something.
I'm mad at him, too, for being out late. But I'm not mad enough to take a chance on losing a ball game and possibly the pennant.
If one were to take the bible seriously one would go mad. But to take the bible seriously, one must be already mad.
Yes, I am mad - like the Marquis de Sade was mad, like Giordano Bruno was mad, like Antonin Artaud was mad.
The only way to build a church, if you have a Bible church, is to preach out of the Bible, teach out of the Bible, read out of the Bible.
That buy is totally cracked out," Vic said one day, as we walked past Balthazar in the great hall. I don't think he's on alything." I didn't mean, for real. If he was cracked out for real, he'd probably be having more fun, right?" Vic shrugged. "Balty looks like he's not having any fun. He looks like he never had any. Like he wouldn't know fun if it started dancing around yelling 'I'm fun' in his face.
When I started out in 'Caravan,' I looked plump, but that looks fine when you are young. But as you age, you put on weight, it looks obnoxious, you slow down and carry a paunch.
This is not going away. At this point of unimaginable threats on the horizon, this is what hope looks like. In these times of a morally bankrupt government that has sold out its principles, this is what patriotism looks like. With countless lives on the line, this is what love looks like, and it will only grow.
Speaking as someone who bought the party line for far too long, you would be amazed what you can believe if you keep convincing yourself the press, the libs, the universities - hell, everyone but a few on the religious fringe and big business - are out to get you. I was lucky - I started to snap out of this a couple of years ago and hopefully will now apply to both major parties the same skepticism and cynicism I had in the past reserved for Democrats.
The Bible is like a telescope. If a man looks through his telescope, then he sees worlds beyond; but if he looks at his telescope, then he does not see anything but that. The Bible is a thing to be looked through, to see that which is beyond; but most people only look at it; and so they see only the dead letter.
I've just stopped worrying about what the game plan looks like, how many targets am I going to have in a game, all of the stuff that would distract me when having fun out there on the football field. It's allowed me to be less stressed and enjoy my teammates more and go out there with a loose mentality and have more fun.
After I quit being a lawyer in '95, I was having a lot of trouble writing. Then I read somewhere that Willa Cather read a chapter of the Bible every day before she started work. I thought, 'Okay, I'll try it.' Before each writing session, I started to read the Bible like a writer, thinking about language, character, and themes.
Mitt Romney looks like a guy modeling briefs on a package of underwear ... He looks like a guy who goes to the restroom when the check comes ... He looks like a guy who would run a seminar on condo flipping ... He looks like he is the closer at a Cadillac dealership.... He looks like that guy on the golf course in the Levitra commercial.
I went straight from high school to Bible college for two years. Then I started doing music right out of Bible college full time. I did independent stuff for three years.
Once I started first grade, I started going to Emmanuel Baptist Church regularly. I went to Sunday school. We had Bible readings and things like that.
I like the Bible folded between lids of cloth, or calfskin, or morocco, but I like it better when, in the shape of a man, it goes out into the world-a Bible illustrated.
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