A Quote by Bryan Clay
Before the decathlon I'm constantly trying to convince myself that I want to do this, that I want to take myself to that place where it's going to hurt and things are going to be tough. But that's like anything - you want to give your best.
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People think the film industry is going to corrupt me, but I feel like it's kept me more innocent, in a way. I wasn't really home when my friends were trying pot for the first time. I was always around adults who wouldn't smoke or curse or do anything like that around me. I don't do things that are dangerous to myself. I don't want to hurt myself
I want to be as healthy as I possibly can be. I just want to make sure that I do everything to take care of myself. Like they say, charity begins at home. Love begins at home, too. So I want to do the best for me. I want to pamper myself and do the best for my body.
I'm always going to want to be part of music. But who's to say? This whole thing for me in the first place just kind of happened without trying. I think about things like acting and all that, but I'm not going to force it on myself. I'm kind of shy, believe it or not.
I'm never going to starve myself for a part. I don't want little girls to be like, 'Oh, I want to look like Katniss, so I'm going to skip dinner.' That's something I was really conscious of during training, when you're trying to get your body to look exactly right. I was trying to get my body to look fit and strong-not thin and underfed.
I'm not out there trying to get press for myself nor am I trying to convince anybody that I'm living any kind of a life. I'm actually trying to convince people: I don't want you to know what I'm living, because it's none of your business.
The film's title You Can't Be Neutral on a Moving Train. comes from something I used to say in teaching my students "This is not going to be a neutral class." The world is already moving in certain directions and wars are going on and children are going hungry. Terrible things are happening. And so to be neutral in a situation like this is to collaborate with whatever is going on. And I don't want to collaborate with the world as it is. I want to intrude myself. I want to participate in changing the direction of things. So that's the origin of the title.
When it comes to my career and investing into myself, I'm going to be very particular and meticulous about how I'm doing things so that I can reach the level of success that I want. I'm also going to take some chances, because who better for me to invest in than myself?
I'm trying to un-polish, like 'reset' myself. I'm trying to take myself back to when I first came in. That's what the fans miss and that's how they accepted me, so I kind of want to go back and give them that.
How many times have I failed before? How many times have I stood here like this, in front of my own image, in front of my own person, trying to convince him not to be scared, to go on, to get out of this rut? How many times before I finally convince myself, how many private, erasable deaths will I need to die, how may self-murders is it going to take, how many times will I have to destroy myself before I learn, before I understand?
If I'm away from you for more than an hour, I can't stop thinking about you. I carry you in my spirit. I pray for you more than I pray for myself...I know you don't believe in fairy tales. But, if you did, I'd want to be your knight in shining armor. You've been through so much. I don't want to see you hurt anymore. Now I may not be able to give you all that your used to. But I do know I can love you past your pain. I don't want you to worry about anything. You just wake up in the morning, that's all you have to do and I'll take it from there...There's one condition...You have to be my wife
I want to be the friend you fall hopelessly in love with. The one you take into your arms and into your bed and into the private world you keep trapped in your head. I want to be that kind of friend. The one who will memorize the things you say as well as the shape of your lips when you say them. I want to know every curve, every freckle, every shiver of your body. I want to know where to touch you, I want to know how to touch you. I want to know convince you to design a smile just for me. Yes, I do want to be your friend. I want to be your best friend in the entire world.
And now I’m looking at you,” he said, “and you’re asking me if I still want you, as if I could stop loving you. As if I would want to give up the thing that makes me stronger than anything else ever has. I never dared give much of myself to anyone before – bits of myself to the Lightwoods, to Isabelle and Alec, but it took years to do it – but, Clary, since the first time I saw you, I have belonged to you completely. I still do. If you want me.
Sometimes I get really down on myself for not having the exact career I want, but it's ok as long as you know what you want and you're going towards that. Accept it's going to be a different path than you thought in the first place.
You go real long in this business, and then you have these light-bulb moments. I just had this fleeting moment of fearlessness and a moment of trust in myself that I'm not going to listen to anyone. I'm going to do it how I want to do it. And how I want to do is what people are going to want to see and promoters want to pay for.
I don't want to stand in front of a whole lot of fakeys. If I'm going to meet someone and say hello, I want to feel like I'm really meeting that person, not a masked version. I want to give that to people when they meet me. You don't have to like it. I'm not looking for you to like it; I'm looking to be myself.
We're all the same, and we all want the same thing. We all want to be secure. We all want food on the table. We want to know that our kids aren't going to be destroyed when they're not with us. We all want the same things, and if we've been hurt in our childhoods, we try and recreate the same hurt.
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