A Quote by Chelsea Handler

I will probably have sex with Eminem after the show is over. Probably, I dont see why I wouldnt. Im fair game, its not like Im that picky, youve seen the guys Ive dated. I like Swizz Beatz, just because I would like to yell out in bed, Swizz Beatz! Keep it coming!
A lot of producers get famous because they decide to be superstars for their own reasons, but I'm inspired by Timbaland and Pharrell and Swizz Beatz 'cause they're doing things that are so different. I like how they're introducing ideas I never would have thought of.
The top five producers that I have a creative chemistry with are Swizz Beatz, The Alchemist, Vinny Idol, Pharrell and Timbaland.
Now Ive got this moniker that Im the foot-in-mouth gal, and I keep thinking, In what way? Because I said something you dont agree with? Because I said something you dont like? Im just telling you my opinion. I hate the idea that I cant be honest about how I feel about things because its going to piss somebody off who feels differently. That seems preposterous to me.
Chris Brown owns 14 of my belts. Swizz Beatz owns a zillion of my belts. They were supporting me before I was even anybody.
Ma-a-a-n-I'm very excited to put my heart into somethin' that's 100% Swizz Beatz. I usually work behind the scenes, and I did that for 10 years, and now I'm ready for the forefront... and [to] really get the legacy moving to another level.
Im just trying to be positive. I like the guys (Im) around. Even though were not at the record Id like to be, even after a loss, guys are mad, but then we have fun and you move on. They look up to me. Ive been around eight years. A lot of these guys were in junior high or high school when I came into the NBA. I see how much of an influence I am off the court. I try to be careful how I approach things on and off the court, because I know these guys are watching.
I love so many different types of music - hard rock, bebop, jazz fusion, R&B. And I've loved meeting and painting so many amazing artists like Lionel Richie, Ronnie Wood, Sia, Steven Tyler, Swizz Beatz, Taylor Swift, James Moody, The Fifth Dimension, Chick Corea, Herbie Hancock and Michael Jackson. It makes me smile thinking about each one of them.
I think youve got to work out what makes you happy. With me, its that I do lots of different things. So Ive got this rather odd career whereby Im not really a stand-up and Im not really an actor and Im not really a writer. But I do them all.
Ive heard some people say that Im selling out, but Im not. If I hadnt done Black Radio, and just kept on doing just piano trio stuff, I wouldnt be honest with myself; Id be doing it to please other people. That would be selling out.
Im 48 now and I would like to have another baby. I would love to because of all the things I have learned. It would be like starting all over again. But am I too old? Im young at heart and I would be different this time round.
Im doing pretty good as far as geniuses go ... Im like a machine. Im a robot. You cannot offend a robot ... Im going down as a legend, whether or not you like me or not. I am the new Jim Morrison. I am the new Kurt Cobain ... The Bible had 20, 30, 40, 50 characters in it. You dont think that I would be one of the characters of todays modern Bible?
Im probably one of the worst people with numbers youve ever met. My brothers always kid that they think Im counting cards in Vegas, but Im just trying to add things up.
I like to just hang out. My friends dont like to do that, but I do. Because, a lot of times Im busy, and I just kind of like to get a chance to just hang out.
Like everyone, there are times when I just dont feel like exercising. When that happens, Im a bit more careful with my diet. But on days I really want a treat, like chocolate, I work out a little harder. I dont believe in beating myself up for not being good.
You know what, man? I dont have time to worry about what people think. Im focused on the youth of America. Im focused on the kids who are dressing like whores. Because thats the message in the media.
When Im not working... Im an actor! Im auditioning! I like to hang out, have fun, drink, club, meet boys, look for boyfriends, play MASH, the usual.
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