A Quote by Daniel Tosh

If you like soccer, then welcome to America. See, our country already has entertainment so watching people chase a ball for four hours to end 0 - 0 is not enjoyable - unless, of course, the bleachers collapse and half of Europe dies.
When I am working, I know this is my work so I can be focused for three hours, four hours, or whatever, and then outside I am a person like you or the children playing soccer in the street.
You're going to see crime levels in America that are going to rival that of a Third World country. Welcome Mexico City. You're going to start seeing people being kidnapped in this country like they do in other underdeveloping nations. It's going to be very violent in America.
This is the face of our political class: arrogant, authoritarian, and on the level of some banana republic south of the border. Welcome to the New America, where leader-worship has taken the place of politics, Team Red and Team Blue battle it out to see who gets to be El Supremo for the next four years, and politics resembles a prolonged soccer game.
I remember watching the Twin Towers collapse. Because it was another country and looked like a film, I just sort of thought, 'Oh.' I didn't think that much. Then three days later, it hit me. I was in a terrible state, and I was tearful for three or four days.
Unless we are able to commit to a permanent growing settlement [on Mars], then I don't think just going there with humans and coming back is worth doing. The expense of planning to come back is like the people who left Europe to come to America and then to turn around and go back to Europe, it really doesn't make any sense at all.
Often you see people who move there and then, once they have arrived, the ball moves here after which they also come here, but then the ball goes there again. I say: just stay where you are, then you are in any case at the right place half of the time.
Klinsmann should be remembered as a great coach; I don't think a lot of people see it, but as players, we really appreciate what he did for America soccer. He opened American soccer up. He gave it a lot more variety of players. You see German-Americans and Mexican-Americans, and you see the guys that were born in America.
We welcome the scrutiny of the world - because what you see in America is a country that has steadily worked to address our problems and make our union more perfect.
A lot of the time I am told to clear the ball, kick it out, 'degager le ballon' they shout, but I can't do that and if I have to do that then it feels like a defeat for me. I don't know how to do it. I never get rid of the ball that way and when I am watching TV and I see players who do get rid of the ball then I don't accept it.
And of course in America you've got American football and baseball and all those other ball games, soccer has become a little niche that the women have kind of filled.
Soccer is the international language. If you bring a soccer ball with you to any other country, you can make friends instantly.
As a member of the Feeding America Entertainment Council, I recognize our mission to spread the word and rally the country in the fight to end hunger.
We in Austria have always had lots of immigration. But when one starts, as happened in Europe last year, to open the borders and to transport people northwards as fast as possible, then of course it's not just Syrians who come. People from all around the world then see their chance to quickly come to Europe.
In a good relationship, people get angry, but in a very different way. The Marriage Masters see a problem a bit like a soccer ball. They kick it around. It's 'our' problem.
Once Europe's colonial empires were sent into deep decline, thanks to World War II, America became globalization's primary replicating force, integrating Asia into its low-end production networks across the second half of the twentieth century - just like Europe had integrated the U.S. before.
As an athlete, I'd average four hours a day. It doesn't sound like a lot when some people say they're training for 10 hours, but theirs includes lunch, massage and breaks. My four hours was packed with work.
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