A Quote by Daniel Tosh

I fell asleep watching the country music channel and woke up racist.

Daniel Tosh

Quote Topics

Asleep Channel Country Country Music Fell Music Racist Up Watching Woke

Quote Author

Daniel Tosh
American - Comedian
Born: May 29, 1975

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.

Rodney Dangerfield

I fell asleep during the draft, actually. I woke up, and I was picked No. 48. I didn't even know what number I was picked.

Marc Gasol

I fell asleep during 'The Dark Knight Rises.' I fell asleep during 'The Hunger Games,' all of them. I cannot stay awake. As soon as a movie starts, I'm asleep!

Tituss Burgess

Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg fell asleep during Obama's speech. She woke up with the other justices drawing a gavel on her face.

Conan O'Brien

I fell asleep on a plane and never woke and now I'm livin a dream.

Wiz Khalifa

They say that love is powerful as cough syrup and Styrofoam. All I know is I fell asleep and woke up in that Monte Carlo With the ugly Kardashian... Lamar, oh, sorry. Yo, we done both set the bar low.

Eminem

I'm watching some television tonight. I'm watching The Discovery Channel. You know, this channel, you never ever plan on watching this. It just happens. You're flickin' around, all of a sudden - boom - you're watching a mole for an hour-and-a-half.

Dane Cook

I did have that happen when I was with the Celtics once - I was there late and no one woke me up when I fell asleep in a chair. But at the Celtics they didn't like me as much, so they let me snooze away and made fun of me.

Daryl Morey

What happened when you woke up?" "I was having a dream. I don’t know what it was, but when I woke up, I had this awful realization that I was awake. It hit me like a brick in the groin." "Like a brick in the groin, I see." "I didn't want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that's really sad. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you're so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare." "And what is that nightmare, Craig?" "Life." "Life is a nightmare." "Yes.

Ned Vizzini

it's a weird thing with acting and it happens to a lot of actors, not just myself - it's like you're giving off an I really need to be loved today vibe. My worst moment recently is I fell asleep on the tube in London on the Victoria line 8:30 in the morning and I woke up and there were about five people with iPhones taking pictures.

Andy Serkis

I woke up only to find the rest of the world asleep.

Leonardo da Vinci

I had a dream that I was awake and I woke up to find myself asleep.

Stan Laurel

Another air traffic controller fell asleep on the job, but he had a good excuse. He was watching President Obama’s deficit speech.

Jay Leno

I like to listen to Congolese music because when I was a kid with my father, he took me to play some tournaments in the car and always put on this music. I always fell asleep with this music so it's good things that I remember.