A Quote by Daniel Tosh
I don't know what's more embarrassing in this country, that Michael Phelps fell from the graces for smoking marijuana or that you looked up to a swimmer in the first place?
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Yesterday Michael Phelps set an all-time Olympic record for most medals. Phelps has so much gold on his chest he's been asked to join the cast of 'Jersey Shore.'
Earlier this week - this is crazy - the country's first marijuana cafe opened up, which not only sells medical marijuana, but also has a restaurant where customers can eat. In a related story, the recession is over.
If you bound the arms and legs of gold-medal swimmer Michael Phelps, weighed him down with chains, threw him in a pool and he sank, you wouldn't call it a 'failure of swimming.' So, when markets have been weighted down by inept and excessive regulation, why call this a 'failure of capitalism'?
Michael Jordan and Michael Phelps are the greatest to ever do what they did, and I'm not. But if you believe that you are, then you're almost as good as being that.
With more and more states legalizing marijuana, companies are lining up to create the first marijuana breathalyzer. Officials say the toughest part is getting stoners to stop trying to inhale off the breathalyzer.
The marijuana that kids are smoking today is not the same as the marijuana that Jeb Bush smoked 40 years ago.
There is no logical basis for the prohibition of marijuana. $7.7 billion is a lot of money, but that is one of the lesser evils. Our failure to successfully enforce these laws is responsible for the deaths of thousands of people in Colombia. I haven't even included the harm to young people. It's absolutely disgraceful to think of picking up a 22-year-old for smoking pot. More disgraceful is the denial of marijuana for medical purposes.
Michael Phelps and Willie Nelson are teaming up to do an album. ... They're covering The Doobie Brothers.
I don't want to be the next Mark Spitz; I want to be the first Michael Phelps
People say that marijuana is going to hurt my career. On the contrary, my fight career is getting in the way of my marijuana smoking.
I've met some of the most famous celebrities in the world but Michael Phelps was the first person I've ever met with whom I was totally star-struck.
I remember that Michael Werner told me about a famous collector, and Michael set up an appointment for us to meet. This man looked around the room and at my pictures. Then he said, "Young man, why are you doing these horrible things? Look out the window. There are nice girls out there. It's springtime. Look at how beautiful the world can be. You'll ruin your health by smoking so much and doing such tortured things."
With Michael Jackson, when he moved, it looked like a martial artist to me. He was quicker than other dancers, but he didn't have muscles; he was just quicker and looked more in control of gravity. He looked like a martial arts master, so I tried to steal body movement from him; that's why I imitate Michael Jackson a little bit.
We're both Welshmen and growing up, when Howard Marks was finally caught, it was all over the news. He did an interview in the Welsh language, which I also speak, and I was sort of just amazed that this man from a small country was for many years supplying much of the world with most of the marijuana it was smoking. It was incredible.
I have a lot of cousins that I don't know. But I think that happens to any celebrity. I wonder how many cousins does Michael Phelps have?
I worked with Michael Black and Michael Showalter on their show 'Michael and Michael Have Issues.' We did some stuff on that, but it ended up not getting picked up for a second season. There will be more stuff, but not right now. Michael Showalter and I are literally next-door neighbors. We see quite a lot of each other.
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