A Quote by Dave Barry

The nicest Father's Day surprise of all for Dad would be if you handed him a box, and he unwrapped it, and there, inside, sitting on a bed of folded tissue, was the pair of his undershorts that somebody threw away six months ago (without asking Dad) because they had reached the stage where they were 3 percent undershorts and 97 percent holes. Dad misses those undershorts. They were his Faithful Undershorts Companion.

Dave Barry

Quote Topics

Asking Away Because Bed Box Companion Dad Day Faithful Father Father's Day Folded Had Handed Him His Holes Inside Misses Months Nicest Pair Percent Reached Sitting Six Six Months Somebody Stage Surprise Those Threw Tissue Were Without Would Would Be

Quote Author

Dave Barry
American - Journalist
Born: July 3, 1947

They found a cave once lived in by Osama bin Laden and the only thing in the cave were some boxer undershorts, and macaroni. I'm telling you, you add an old stack of Playboys, this could be my place. It's like I have a twin.

David Letterman

I would have loved to have had a gay dad. At school, there were always kids saying 'my dad is bigger than your dad, my dad will batter your dad!' So what? My dad will shag your dad..and your dad will enjoy it.

Frankie Boyle

My dad died in May of '97. The effects of his death immediately were not all that hard, but a year or two later it hit, when my job as Dad was sort of done and I was sending my kids to college. And somehow, the emotional intensity of that event mixed with the loss of my own dad, was kind of upsetting.

Wayne Watson

I was raised by my mom. My dad was always traveling, but she allowed me and encouraged me to be close to my dad. So I grew up with three parents: my mom, my dad and my stepmom. Ninety percent of the time I was with my mom, and 10 percent was with my dad.

Brian J. White

My dad is my dad. I love him, and I realize that he's as famous as he is. Of course, I don't look at him like everybody else does. Because I know his little faults, I know his weaknesses. Nobody's perfect. But he's my dad. Just like your dad is to you.

Laila Ali

Even in the 1960's, look at the minority percent of those kids being raised without a father. It was around 20 percent. America is at 80% today. I think the government is to blame for that. I think the media is to blame for that. I think you have to look at television shows and sitcoms. How do they portray fathers? They are dopey. They are dumb. They are fat. The mom is hot and the kids make fun of dad, and mom makes fun of dad. We have just relegated his role to be sort of the dumpy loser guy. And we need to get that back.

Kevin Sorbo

I always consult my father before I take on a project. Not just me - even my brother goes to Dad and speaks to him of his business ideas. Dad has an amazing business acumen, and it would be foolish not to take his advice. Plus, he's our dad at the end of the day, and he would want to see us succeed. He always gives us the best advice.

Allu Arjun

Perhaps it is no surprise I became an entertainer because many of my relatives were natural performers. Dad, who had a fine pair of lungs, was master of ceremonies at East Ham working men's club in east London. I felt so proud when I saw him in his white gloves calling out the names of the dances.

Vera Lynn

One Dad I know uses what I call Post-It® Note therapy on his children. He leaves sticky Post-It Notes everywhere ...in their lunch box, inside their shoes, on top of their sandwich before he wraps it up. He once went into his daughter's room, looking for his hammer, and on the back of her bedroom door were every Post-It Note he'd ever given her - over 250 in all with simple messages like 'Great job'...'I love you'...or 'You're special to me.' Do you think that girl knew, without a doubt, that her Dad valued her and loved her?

Jack Canfield

I didn't know my dad for a long time. My dad was on drugs and my dad was at the VA Hospital, my dad was off in his own world selling drugs or using them or there would be crack heads in the house or whatever it would be.

Shia LaBeouf

Barney's Dad was really bad so Barney hatched a plan when his dad said "Eat your peas." Barney shouted no and ran Barney tricked his mean old dad and locked him in the cellar Barney's Mom never found out where he'd gone, Cause Barney didn't tell her. There his dad spent his life eating mice and gruel With every bite for fifty years he was sorry he'd been cruel

Bill Watterson

My dad, bless him, was a musician. And his dad had thought that his music was rubbish.

Paul McCartney

I get asked to give stuff to my dad. I'm, like, 'I'm not gonna pass your script to him!' You know? My dad's my dad. I'm not his agent.

Domhnall Gleeson

Not a lot of people know this story but I actually got into the business without even telling anyone in my family. It was something I did on my own and I had been training for six to eight months before I told my dad and my step-dad.

Tessa Blanchard

You see another side of Draco when he's with his dad. When Draco is with his dad, he doesn't say anything. He keeps his mouth shut. He's sort of bullied by his dad, so he acts very different.