A Quote by Dennis Miller
The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What's the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you'd get a pulse.
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Some time ago, I learned how to say, 'What's the worst thing that could happen up there?' I could mess up some words, I could sing flat... I could appear human. Is that really the worst thing in the world?
You think that their dying is the worst thing that could happen. Then they stay dead.
Recently I read the stories I wrote in my early 20s, to put in a volume. And here is this brittle young woman, writing about marriage as, not the worst thing, but the most boring thing that could happen to a person. Now I think I was wrong. I like to be proven wrong.
If the worst thing that can happen is that nobody laughs, then I can deal with that, because the worst thing that can happen at the factory is that I could lose a limb or be crushed by a huge machine.
I learned and it was exactly what I needed [Transcendental Meditation]. The thing that blew me away was that it was the easiest thing I've ever done- not the easiest meditation, but the easiest thing I've ever learned. I learn a lot of things- that's my job! It's so simple to learn, so simple to practice. And the restoration that comes to you, the benefit across your life; it's changed everything.
Another thing I find extremely eerie is that when people build a house, they almost exactly get it wrong. They don't just get it partly wrong, they get it dead wrong.
The worst thing you could ever get is people who think they know everything.
Over the years, people have often said to us that they were going through some horrible thing in their life - maybe the worst thing that had ever happened, or that they could think would ever happen - and that, somehow, in that state, we made them laugh. And I was like, 'That's a wonderful calling.'
And often the worst thing wasn't the victims--they were dead, after all, and beyond any more pain. The worst thing was those who loved them and survived them. Often the walking dead from now on, shell-shocked, hearts ruptured, stumbling through the remainder of their lives without anything left inside of them but blood and organs, impervious to pain, having learned nothing except that the worst things did, in fact, sometimes happen. (Mystic River)
I thought deeply about this. I ended up concluding that the worst thing that could possibly happen as we get big and as we get a little more influence in the world is if we change our core values and start letting it slide, I can't do that. I'd rather quit.
How do you tell an adult that maybe everything wrong in the world stems from the fact that she's stopped believing the impossible can happen?
A couple days before the stunts, if I'm doing something particularly dangerous, I will go over every worst-case scenario in my head, like this could happen, this could happen, this could happen, this could happen. I try to think about that to where it's ingrained in me.
I had sinus surgery the day after Christmas and it has been the worst surgery of my life. Very painful. And on top of it everyone of course thought I got a nose job. Which is so funny because if you know me I would have told you I got a nose job I'm not gonna keep it a secret.
If we can get that realistic feminine morality working for us, if we can trust ourselves and so let women think and feel that an unwanted child or an oversize family is wrong -- not ethically wrong, not against the rules, but morally wrong, all wrong, wrong like a thalidomide birth, wrong like taking a wrong step that will break your neck -- if we can get feminine and human morality out from under the yoke of a dead ethic, then maybe we'll begin to get somewhere on the road that leads to survival.
If you're a reporter, the easiest thing in the world is to get a story. The hardest thing is to verify. The old sins were about getting something wrong, that was a cardinal sin. The new sin is to be boring.
The easiest thing to do is to rag on the media, because it isn't doing a very good job right now. It is so much easier to profit from celebrating the worst aspects of ourselves. Acting strikes me as the antithesis of that. We can examine the worst aspects of ourselves, but we don't have to celebrate them.
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