A Quote by Ivan Moody
Myself, I usually wait until I get home to write. While we're touring, I try to stay as focused as possible on the moment at hand because I feel like I'll be robbing the fans if I don't.
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Anxiety is a really crippling condition, and I suffer with it myself, and I feel for anyone who suffers from it. The way that I deal with it is try as much as possible to stay in the moment to not think about the past and not think about what's coming up in the future: to try and just seize the moment as much as possible.
I write to invite the voices in, to watch the angel wrestle, to feel the devil gather on its haunches and rise. I write to hear myself breathing. I write to be doing something while I wait to be called to my appointment with death. I write to be done writing. I write because writing is fun.
I try not to write more than two or three, I try to just write one if possible, I write till the end at least a draft of a play or a novel; but sometimes, I'll take a break for a couple weeks for a project that is paying me money like a television project which I try to stay away from just to stay financially ahead of the game.
I feel like what's important is to interact with your fans online. Touring is really important to stay connected with your fans.
I feel like I have a job to do, like I constantly have to reinvent myself. The more I up the ante for myself, the better it is in the long run. I try to interact with my fans as much as possible. It's good that the person I'm being onstage isn't really an act. It's really me.
I do have personal relationships with a lot of "fans," in quotations. I answer all my mail, I get emails from fans, and I try to answer them all. That's important to me, but occasionally there's the thing where people basically ask me to write book reports for them, and I don't have that kind of time. I feel like there's a certain sexism involved, like because I'm a woman I'm supposed to constantly be like giving to everybody.
I believe, and this is something I also learned from Alice Munro, that there's a moment where the personal becomes totally universal. When you see that person in their pathetic moment, that's the moment where the completely unifying sympathy with that person is possible - where you're no longer a person here and they're someone over there, and you can really feel like one, you can really feel like a human being. Or more like, you can really feel like flesh and blood, because I feel like that moment is the same thing with animals.
Touring definitely makes you appreciate home more, so when I can be home, I like to stay home.
Hollywood, young or otherwise, is a very trend-driven town, and that can get a little out of hand at times. I just try to stay true to my own personal taste - incorporating my personality while not taking myself too seriously.
Normally when there are fans you are focused just because of that, because you know when you're going to make a mistake, everybody is like, 'Whoa,' you feel this mistake more. Also, you feel more if you score a goal. It's more emotional when there are fans.
You can't always say and do things and wait until the right moment, when everything is perfectly lined up. As women, I feel like we do that. I just see so many women take the back seat and wait until the right opportunity, and when you do that, you miss out on the best things.
I do try to stay involved in training and keep that routine as much as I can. I just feel I need to do it for myself, not because the manager demands it, but because you get to a stage where you have to manage yourself - what suits you; what doesn't.
My tendency is to be quiet and to stay focused and in character. Not the entire time, but certainly to stay focused while I'm on set.
I tend to like to write a song and then think about it for a while. I record a demo of it and then put it away and wait until I've gotten more thoughts on it or get sure exactly how to approach it.
I always feel like a doctor who loses a patient on the operating table or something where I felt just devastated and I beat myself up until I get to try it the next night and “I'll get it better tonight.” So I'm hard on myself. I think I'm not alone in that regard with acting.
I started to travel like this at the age of 15 so for me, it's normal. Some days you get tired and you feel, 'I want to stay at home a little bit more,' but it's only the moment.
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