A Quote by Jackie Gleason
Golf and women are a lot alike. You know you are not going to wind up with anything but grief, but you can't resist the impulse.
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You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're exactly alike.
There is in government a living impulse to extend itself indefinitely; and there is in freedom a necessity to resist that impulse.
I don't follow golf! I don't keep up with golf or know who is coming or going. I am just here to play the game and be done with it.
New grief, when it came, you could feel filling the air. It took up all the room there was. The place itself, the whole place, became a reminder of the absence of the hurt or the dead or the missing one. I don't believe that grief passes away. It has its time and place forever. More time is added to it; it becomes a story within a story. But grief and griever alike endure.
There are no absolutes in golf. Golf is such an individual game, and no two people swing alike.
I look for women I know are gonna bust me up good. Come on, man, who can resist that? Who can resist that emotional pain? Yeah, they all have the same line, they're so sweet: I'm not gonna hurt you like all the others. Really I'm not. I'm gonna introduce you to a whole new level of pain!
My grandpa was the one; he started taking up golf when I was about two and introduced me to the game as far as just taking me to the driving range where I grew up playing. That was really all he had to do was let me hit a golf ball and kind of fell in love with it from there. He didn't really have to teach me a whole lot or anything.
A lot of my buddies also played golf, but when it came to going to the beach or on the boat and chasing girls, they usually went that way and I went to the golf course to practice. Sometimes they'd come from the beach at dark to pick me up at the course.
The way that I look at it is that, when we film for eight months straight for a new 'Jackass' movie, I know that I'm going to wind up with at least two broken bones. I don't know when it's going to happen, but you can't contemplate how you're going to fall and what's going to happen.
We get the best people we can get and it turns out a lot of them are women. I've said this before If you hire people solely on their merit you wind up hiring a lot of women. I wonder how many other shows even come close to our numbers.
I've been around golf my whole life. My father did it all the time, and I resented him for it. But a couple years ago I picked up a golf club and I understood the physics of it. If anyone knows anything about golf, it's that once you hit a few shots, you'll become addicted.
He knows all the golf lingo. You know? You hit your ball, he's like "there's a golf shot. That's a golf shot." Well of course it's a golf shot; I just hit a golf ball. You don't see Gretzky skating around going "there's a hockey shot, that's a hockey shot."
There's a lot of women now with a whole lot of style but they are not necessarily song stylists. Some of their style is a lot like me and a lot of people sound a lot alike - you can't tell them apart.
Fundamentally, as human beings, we're very, very alike and a lot more alike than we think, but we have a tendency to divide the world into them and us. In prison, when people commit a crime and we put them away, they definitely become "them." We don't want to deal with it because they have chosen to step out of society, so we're going to keep them out. Even if they serve their time, we're going to make sure that, for the rest of their lives, they're going to be branded. I don't know how to do it in a different way, but I think it clearly doesn't work.
I wind up playing these characters a lot: They have self-esteem issues, or they're going through a lot as a young adult.
A lot of my buddies also played golf, but when it came to going to the beach or on the boat and chasing girls, they usually went that way and I went to the golf course.
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