A Quote by Jeff Dunham

I'm a Macintosh nut. I got my PowerBook, so if I'm not writing jokes, I'm working on that.

Jeff Dunham

Quote Topics

Got Jokes Macintosh Nut Working Writing

Quote Author

Jeff Dunham
American - Comedian
Born: April 18, 1962

I got a pit bull from a shelter, so my whole life is centered on this dog, and I've been writing a lot of dog jokes. I should probably give up now, because I'm writing jokes about my dog.

Joe Mande

I never sensed really bad blood between Microsoft and Apple. A lot of Macintosh users feel badly about PCs and do have some bad feelings. I call them Macintosh bigots a little. They say, oh, no, only the Macintosh is the good one, and I don't like to be that way.

Steve Wozniak

Tweeting is a great way to practice writing jokes, but there is so much more to comedy writing than just jokes. Jokes are a necessity, but you also have to learn how to write characters, to break a story, to keep coherence between episodes. I've learned more by being a TV writer than I ever could've on my own.

Megan Amram

I hope I never have to stop acting. I love it. But, I think the coolest thing about acting is working with these amazing people all the time, and writing represented a new way to meet those people and to tell stories, at the same time, which I've always wanted to do, and to tell jokes. I love comedy, so writing was a way of getting these jokes that I had down on the page.

Josh Lawson

I do have a side as a citizen, and I've always expressed it, and that's where I've gotten into misunderstandings, because some people see me as a leftist nut or whatever. A conspiracy nut. All that stuff. These are definitions that don't really apply to a dramatist, because a dramatist is working from empathy.

Oliver Stone

I always thought it was important to overdeliver, and when I got one of my first jobs, writing jokes for Garry Shandling when he was hosting the Grammys, I stayed up all night and wrote a hundred jokes, and I thought, "I'm always going to be the person that gives them more than they requested, and that's why they'll want to keep me around."

Judd Apatow

People are writing shorter jokes. The style I've started with was almost trying to keep jokes under 140 characters before Twitter.

Nick Thune

A lot of people get into stand-up as a back door into acting or something. But I really like writing jokes and telling jokes.

Ali Wong

I learned all those jokes in second grade. Second grade is really where they tell you those horrific jokes, racist jokes and misogynistic jokes that you have no idea what they mean, and you just memorize them because they have a very strong effect, they make people laugh in this kind of nervous, horrible way, and it's only later that you realize that you've got a head full of crap.

Chuck Palahniuk

I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes.

P. J. O'Rourke

I think I have got a lot better as an interviewer. I let people talk now which is something you need to do. At the beginning I thought jokes, jokes, jokes, I am a stand up comedian but I think I have mellowed out now.

Alan Carr

Writing your own jokes, you just kind of keep working on something until you think it might work, and then you try it out and hope for the best.

Aziz Ansari

I realized, in removing or rewriting these jokes, that often the jokes weren't done or that I was using, for me, the curse words as kind of a crutch. So then I just started writing.

Jim Gaffigan

The great thing about writing jokes for President Obama is that he is not afraid to tell jokes that are actually funny - and not just funny for a politician.