A Quote by Jessica Sanchez
I want to let my fans know that I will not hold myself back anymore. Everybody knows me as "15-Year-Old Little Jessica who was on 'American Idol' and who is this sweet, quiet girl." I am very soft-spoken, but I have gone through numerous experiences, and I want to speak out and tell people what has been going on in my life.
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I found this website, The Experience Project, which has people write first-hand experiences of their life and what they went through. There would be a 75-year-old man who talked about his childhood or a 15-year-old girl who talked about what she is going through right now. It was amazing to read their personal thoughts.
I want to let my fans get to know a little about me. I'm very thankful for everything they've done for me so, of course, I'm going to let them into my world a bit. But I really am a very private person, and I love kepping my life to myself - that's how I've always been.
My body is full of graves. A sepulcher is dug up, and a young girl comes out of it with her dusty hands in tears. A lady who is a young girl and an old girl at the same time feels the presence of the young girl. I feel that the 15-year-old me and the 50-year-old me come out of the sepulcher through an illegal excavation.
Old women especially are invisible. I have been to parties where no one knows who I am, so I am ignored until I introduce myself to someone picked at random. Immediately, word gets round, and I am surrounded by people who tell me they are my biggest fans.
When I'm performing for the people, I am me, then. I am that little girl who, when she was five years old, used to sing at church. Or I'm that 15-year-old young lady who wanted to be grown and wanted to sing and couldn't wait to be smokin' a cigarette, you know?
It's good for my fans to be able to connect with me as a person because I am a very normal 15-, 16-year-old girl. I still get in trouble. I still have boy problems and friend problems so it's just very good for my fans to see that.
It's funny because ever since 'American Idol,' people look at me without makeup and think I'm 15 years old - they think I'm really young and quiet and shy, and that I've never been in a relationship and have never been in love or anything.
Some people aren't smart enough to understand the intellectual part of a being. That's why as a 30-year-old you don't have a conversation with a 15-year-old. I don't dine with 15-year-olds and talk about life. Our experiences are completely different.
I don't know if it [Mary and Jane] is a do-over or wanting someone to have made certain entertainment for us that did not exist when we were that age, but we keep going back and doing it again. I have a 12-year-old girl now and I want to make things that will speak to her. Things that will that have lessons for her to take away.
I am very grateful for the opportunities provided to me through appearing on 'American Idol.' The value that the fans and the show have given to my career is not lost on me. However, I have not felt that I have been free to conduct my career in a way that I am comfortable with.
I don't want to tell a 15 or 14 year old what they should be doing. I want them to tell me. And that's what I got when I met Justin Bieber for the first time.
I've told many people that I'm not looking to go out there and find the most beautiful girl in the world who likes me because I'm 'Mr. American Idol Scott McCreery.' If I could just find a nice hometown girl who just likes me for who I am, that's all I want.
"I guess I've been waiting so long I'm looking for perfection. That makes it tough."
"Waiting for perfect love?"
"No, even I know better than that. I'm looking for selfishness. Like, say I tell you I want to eat strawberry shortcake. And you stop everything you're doing and run out and buy it for me. And you come back out of breath and get down on your knees and hold this strawberry shortcake out to me. And I say I don't want it anymore and throw it out the window. That's what I'm looking for."
Most people tell you they want to get out of kindergarten, but don't believe them. Don't believe them! All they want you to do is to mend their broken toys. "Give me back my wife. Give me back my job. Give me back my money. Give me back my reputation, my success." This is what they want; they want their toys replaced. That's all. Even the best psychologist will tell you that, that people don't really want to be cured. What they want is relief; a cure is painful.
I know exactly what I want to buy and I spend very little time, maybe 15 hours a year, buying stuff. I'll go in and out of Dunhill in 45 minutes and pick out a few suits. Boom. And I'm gone. I get my shirts at Charvet. I go in there - woosh - and buy 12 shirts and some ties; once a year and that's it.
When you are out of favor, so to speak, it's not just the reviewers. It's the editors, the publishers, they don't want you anymore, you're just gone and you've been written out of history as effectively as the old Stalinists would write someone else out, take their photograph out of a book.
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