A Quote by John Astin
Sometimes when I see a performance that really takes me, I struggle. How can I express this to this person, I want this person to know how I felt. I want to get this across, and it's not very easy.
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I want people to know me as a real person, that I struggle with the same things they do, that I had to teach myself how to get through life in efficient ways.
Am I a good person? Deep down, do I even really want to be a good person, or do I only want to seem like a good person so that people (including myself) will approve of me? Is there a difference? How do I ever actually know whether I'm bullshitting myself, morally speaking?
I think fashion is really opened me up as a person. All eyes are on you when you do the shows and when you do the photo shoots. You have to know how to act around people. I used to be a shy kid in school. I didn't know how to interact with people and now I find it so easy. Fashion has really done something great for me and it's really changed me as a person. I've changed my style as well.
I want to let my fans get to know a little about me. I'm very thankful for everything they've done for me so, of course, I'm going to let them into my world a bit. But I really am a very private person, and I love kepping my life to myself - that's how I've always been.
...because in a way it happened to someone else. I don't really speak that person's language anymore, and when I think about her, she embarrasses me sometimes, but I don't want to forget her, I don't want to pretend she never existed. So before I start forgetting, I have to get down exactly who she was, and exactly how she felt about everything. She was me a lot longer than I've been me so far.
I think it is my big advantage that I know Putin personally... that he can trust me, that he can see in me a new generation. I want to be a person who really makes him see how many people are against the system.
The toughest opponent is me. A lot of times, you don't want to train. You don't want to box. Sometimes, life hits you to the point where you don't even want to live. You have to fight with that person. You have to make yourself wake up in the morning. You have to make yourself watch your weight. That's how I fight with that person.
But how to do feelings? All very well to write "She felt sad", or describe what a sad person might do, but what of sadness itself, how was that put across so it could be felt in all its lowering immediacy? Even harder was the threat, or the confusion of feeling contradictory things.
I made promises to you that I'm not sure I can keep. None of it has anything to do with you. It's just that I don't know what to do now. You must be thinking what a rotten person I am. Well, believe me, I'm thinking the same thing. I don't know how this happened or why. Maybe I can get over it. Do you think you can wait - because I don't want you to stop loving me. I keep remembering us and how it was. I don't want to hurt you ... not ever.
Well, it hurts my feelings because the person that I read about sometimes in these gossip magazines is not the person who I am. So I don't want, you know, my fans to think that's how I am.
If you really want to know how a person will operate, look at how they've lived their life.
I felt mocked. "That's what I get for trusting you." He took a step back. "Excuse me! Trust doesn't mean you get the response you want from someone, but that you'll get an honest response, and that the other person will stick by you even when you can't agree." Stick by you for how long, through how much? I wondered. What is the expiration date on trust?
I love telling stories, but I also am more aware now of how complex reality is and how difficult it is to really explain what happened or how I felt. Maybe that sometimes makes me a little bit vague, because I don't want to really put my finger on anything or set it in stone.
It's not what I want, Trish. It's what you want. It's what you need. And even though we're opponents tonight in the 6 person, tag team table match, I see how you look at me. You could cut the sexual tension between is with a knife. So I just want to let you know no matter the outcome, I'm always available to give to a healthy dose of Vitamin C.
Sometimes, the best thing to do is just to sit down and listen to another person's experience and listen how they express themselves and want to be seen by others.
A big part of making an album is that you want to have enough material - you want to have enough stuff for people to hear and know that it represents you. So it does sometimes turn into a situation where you're saying to the person you're working with, "Well, what do you want?" But then there are other times when I work with people and they'll turn to me and say, "How do you want to do this?" And that's actually when I work best.
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