It's getting better and better. You know, guys are feeling more comfortable and they are not afraid to speak up and be a leader. I mean, our team, we have 25 players, we have about 25 leaders, too. So whatever someone says, people listen.
I have two sons, ages 23 and 25, and know that parents need to listen more and speak less. Young people today don't always know what's going on or how they fit in, and if someone walks up to them and says, 'Hey, kid: If you listen to me I'll give you power and a sense of purpose,' it can hold tremendous appeal.
Maybe my way of showing leadership is a little more expressive and people see more from me than other players but I think at the end of the day, you have to have 25 leaders in the team if you want to win something.
Domestic violence is a societal problem, not just the NFL's. A lot of the guys felt misunderstood - just because one guy did something to his partner didn't mean they were all like that. We need to help our guys not just be better players, but better people, and to do that, we need to put more into helping them understand difficult relationship situations or miscommunication, rather than addressing only the punishment. The guys felt comfortable talking to me about stuff. They knew I have a doctorate in psychology, so they'd find me and say, "Can I borrow you for a sec"?
When I gave up me, I became more. I became a captain, a leader, a better person and I came to understand that life is a team game...And you know what?...I've found most people aren't team players. They don't realize that life is the only game in town. Someone should tell them. It has made all the difference in the world to me.
I'm not sure leaders listen enough, especially to their people. And I've always thought in everything I've tried to do in my life, in the jobs I've had, is that if we can turn our transmitters off and our receivers on more often, we're better leaders and we know more of what is going on and therefore we can lead more effectively.
The best thing about being 45 is not taking myself so seriously. Do I miss the package I came in at 25? I do. Gravity is no one's friend. Yet the perspective I've gained is so worth the wear and tear. What would have mortified me at 25 is now simply fodder for a funny, relatable story. Also? I was a waitress at 25, and now I'm an author. Forty-five is definitely better.
I like to have fewer players. That way, everyone is plugged into what you're doing. There is a risk attached to that sometimes but it's good to have a smaller squad. People have more chance of playing; they're ready and more motivated. Having 18 real players is better than having 25 or 26 not playing.
Fighters are afraid of conditioning, they are afraid of getting tired, but I don't want to have anxiety or be afraid of anything. I can go 100 percent out there and never have to worry about getting tired. Everybody says fighting is 90 percent mental, and it's true. Knowing you can go 15 minutes or 25 minutes without any problem can help you sustain that mental advantage over your opponent.
After years of research, I discovered 25 differences in the work-life choices of men and women. All 25 lead to men earning more money, but to women having better lives.
What I'm worried about is our team and our players developing and getting better. That's the most important thing.
The NBA is getting bigger. Basketball is getting better around the world. There are more players. There are better coaches around it, so that's why there are more international players, not only Hispanic players, but from everywhere.
I love real books, paper books, but I also love buying online, and I think that people are more willing to take a chance to read something if it's cheaper - sometimes books on the Kindle are $6. A hardback book is $25. For $25, it better be a really great book. Or you're going to be mad.
Women are more sensitive, more practical, more intelligent, more balanced, better able to deal with people, better cooks, better parents, better carers, better leaders, and so on and so forth.
To my mind, you cannot speak about the need for leadership within our communities without being prepared to take on responsibility yourself. It's not enough to point the finger at those who have let us down and to expect others to come forward and fix our problems. Nor can anyone afford to call themselves a leader unless they truly have the interests of our community at heart. Too many people like to think they are leaders and too many are identified by the media as leaders who are not really leaders at all.
As a company grows from 25 to 50 to 100 to 200 to 500 to 1000 people, the characteristics of who is the very best talent in leadership roles will change. It's rarely the case that your leadership team at 1000 people is the same leadership team you had a 25 people.
When you sit with people you love, if you say something stupid, they call you on it - because they're honest with you and they're making you better. That's what we're as couches going to have here with our players. We're going to have an honest respect for one another, to make everyone maximize the potential they have. I expect the players to listen to me, and I'm going to listen to them. We've got to make each other better, and it's the way to create safety, because the players know you've got their backs. When you tell a player what you want, he will try to please you.