A Quote by K. Flay
I was always very academically focused when I was growing up, and music was something for which I really had no preconceptions or expectations for myself or really any rules. It kind of represented, at least for me, a divergent path of creativity and self-discovery.
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I was on a path that could've really led to disaster, and the one thing for me that really kept me focused and gave me something to believe in and a sense of self-worth and a discipline was music.
My parents are kind of young, and my dad always listened to rock music and stuff like that, so I sort of grew up around that. As far as acting goes, I didn't really have any major influences because it wasn't really something that I focused on.
I had a little bit of expectations just to be not terrible, because you can't be named so similar to a sport and not be at least adequate at that sport. I don't think there's been expectations to be really good, because my parents never put that kind of pressure on me, but I had to be at least decent.
I grew up as a very sarcastic person. I was always the class clown, and to date girls, I had to be really funny. I was really skinny growing up. I was so thin, I had to run around in the shower to get wet. That kind of thin. So I always had to rely on humor and sarcasm.
When I look at my own career, growing up, I was doing really well at age 11, but it was kind of isolating because back then, people weren't hanging out with me. My mom was always there. She had my back and was like, 'You keep focused. You gotta keep focused.' And I think those kinds of lessons were hard.
The thing is, when you're kind of creatively self-employed, your brain just kind of chooses the path of least resistance, so if you really exhausted and you've had a long day, then that's typically when you might respond to emails or if you're on a plane and have nothing else to do, then you might listen to music and write these satirical pieces trying to explain the charts with music theory.
I was a very focused kid. I always had this crazy lifestyle... billions of jobs, two hours of gymnastics every day, handball, anything with a ball, really. I must have had ADHD or something. I was very energetic, and very small. I didn't start growing until the last year of high school.
It's very important, at least to me as a writer, that there be some rules on the table when I'm writing. Rules come from genres. You're writing in a genre, there are rules, which is great because then you can break the rules. That's when really exciting things happen.
When I was growing up, I wasn't in bands, and had really no intention of ever doing music. I went out to California for college, and kind of on a whim started making music really as a joke, and over the course of the next five years started playing a lot of shows, and music became this really integral part of my identity.
I remember growing up and feeling like I didn't really see much of myself represented. Or if I did, there were only a few types of roles that had authority.
I was pretty sheltered growing up. I just started getting into heavier music with the Tooth & Nail/Solid State era, which really kind of brought this whole thing to life for me, so I am really thankful for that label.
When I was auditioning for Divergent, I was kind of in the dumps. I wasn't really happy with acting, and I didn't know if I wanted to do it anymore. I went on a bunch of auditions and nothing worked out. Then they said, "Hey, you got a callback for this thing, Divergent." Because I was in such a weird place in my life, I didn't look up what it was about, didn't look up the director, didn't look up that Shai Woodley was a part of it. I read the script, obviously, but I closed myself off from anything else.
During my career as a standup and actor, I realized it was very frustrating for me to get hired because Hollywood was hiring a different kind of brother, you know, and I was doing political humor... In order for me to really have a long career, I'm going to have to learn how to write and produce for myself... I had no idea I was really going to like it and I'm very fortunate to be successful. But the idea was to always eventually create something for myself. That was the idea from the beginning when I went into writing and producing.
I would like for people to not be stuck by the rules of what is expected of a classical musician. If you really want to do something different, don't be afraid to do so. Think of music itself and not the rules or expectations of people.
I've always loved comedy and growing up it was the comedies that I really responded to. So I don't know how it turned out that once I started acting that I started getting a certain kind of role, that I never saw myself as growing up, so I really love when I get an opportunity to play a [comedian] role.
You can always veer off the path, that's one thing that has really comforted me over the past year. When you think, 'I can't do something because of this, this and this,' you can actually do anything you want. I could go ballistic right now and tear this whole room apart. I could. I'm not going to, because logic is stopping me, but you can do whatever you want. You really can veer off any path at any time - never give up.
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