A Quote by Keri Russell
While 'Felicity' was successful in the States, and I had opportunities to do other stuff, I didn't want to do anything to make myself more famous. I wasn't dealing well with the celebrity of all of that. I was 23 - just a kid - and not coming from money, it was all just too much. I just wanted to slow it down a little bit, and gain control.
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I think some fans are very passionate, they just say what they want to say but they just need to slow it down a bit. We're still only human. We're not what people think. We might be famous but we love the sport and just want to play football.
I'd done all my research and seen that Booker and Gadson had worked with giant folks and little peanuts, too. That just showed me that they're musicians. They're not just interested in doing the big ones, they're interested in doing stuff that - pardon the expression - gives them a boner. I'm like that, too. I don't want to just do easy stuff. I want to keep myself freaked out all the time. Hence the title of the record, I Like To Keep Myself in Pain.
Each song had a different way of coming about. In some, the music was written first while others it was the lyrics. We didn't want to overthink anything too much - we just wanted to, writing-wise, chuck out as many ideas as possible.
I wanted to be on American TV so much. I didn't park DJ'ing; I just sort of ended up becoming more of a studio guy. I had a bit more money and I could buy every little piece of equipment and drum machine that had just come out - I've got quite a collection now - and I continued to collect music.
If I have enough money to support myself, I'll just give stuff away. I just, I want people to see it and I want to be able to do this for a living, you know what I mean? So it's just a balance. If I'm not doing well for five years, then I'm selling stuff, but if I'm doing well and I can afford to give stuff away, I'll always do that.
Anything that I wanted to do in my career that I wanted to do always worked out. The stuff I got talked into always failed. All the stuff I was talked into, by brilliant managers, because it always came down to, "Know how much money you'll make?" And then it would just fail.
I never had a desire to be famous... I was fat. I didn't know any fat famous actresses... You know, once a fat kid, always a fat kid. Because you always think that you just look a little bit wrong or a little bit different from everyone else. And I still sort of have that.
I've just been enjoying the training a bit more. I've put too much pressure on myself in the past. Just relax and let it come. I just went out there to have a bit of fun tonight.
Look, rich people already have a lot of money. There's literally trillions of dollars in cash held by corporations, their stock valuations at an all-time high. They do not need a tax cut to do anything. They can invest now, if they wanted to. They don't want to, because they can make more money just by mergers and stock buybacks and stuff like that. So, this is really just sort of a travesty.
Being producer you're still going to have to sell somebody who's going to give you the money on the idea and everything like that. But it does give you a little bit more control if you're thinking in that creative process; it gives you more control to tell the story you want to tell rather than sort of just reading a script that somebody else wrote and says, "Yes, please, you can hire me for this job." So it's a little bit more hands-on, a little bit more closer to the heart.
I just saw dialogue, in the audition, and had no backstory. I was like, "I'm just going to be myself because I have no idea who this is or where he's coming from." The typical questions that actors have to ask themselves were very hard. I had to imagine, a little bit, and just made it work.
I think Korea is so focused on just the charts, and what's going to chart and what's not, and I'm sure it's like that way in the States as well, to a certain degree. But I enjoy working in the States a little bit more. Because it's more about making music that is the right sound and the right fit to me, not so much just chasing the charts.
There came a time in my life where I just wanted to go out there and get myself a job somewhere. Boxing was all I had in my life for so long and there just came a point where the whole thing just became a bit too much for me.
I get a bit nervous because I just want the show to go well. I think you always have to be a little bit nervous, or else you're a little checked-out, and that's maybe the time when you're not doing your best stuff, because you're kind of just checked-out and falling back on stuff.
Just in myself the motivation side of it, maybe just being a little bit more aggressive to get something out of myself a little bit more. I definitely play better with it.
So I've definitely had a crazy career, but I'm starting to put it together and starting to take my time and know that I can really do some damage if I just slow down just a little bit.
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