A Quote by Kerri Walsh
At some point you're like, gosh, this rehab is never going to end, and then all of a sudden I'm full strength and I'm about to go to my first competition. So I feel really great.
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The drinking was getting way out of control. I just didn't recognize myself anymore. I didn't know what I was doing or where I was. I always had to have some drinks with me in my bag. Just waking up shaking and then having Bloody Marys on your own, first thing in the morning-I started to feel really pathetic about it. So I was like, "I can't live like this." It was just this really awful feeling of becoming a totally different person and not being able to control it at all. Then I tried to not drink, but that didn't work. So I figured I should just go to rehab.
I still get stage fright every time. I also feel very, very sleepy about a minute before we go on. Like I feel like I'm going to fall asleep. I can't explain it. It's sort of like, "Where's the energy going to come from to play this show?" Then all of a sudden you step up and there it is, it's like it's waiting for you.
You can just keep going and going and going, and you never get to the end of it because there is no end. The ending is a beginning. If you feel like that, then you accept that wherever you have to stop on this journey, you continue in some other form somewhere else.
This transition of being a woman and a breadwinner - it took some time for my dad to get used that. It took some time for my husband. I was like, gosh, I've worked so hard to be here, and then all of a sudden I don't know if I feel comfortable being here.
All of a sudden, I was hearing stories about how difficult I was to work with, ridiculous rumors about drugs and what a diva I was. I never had to go to rehab or a program.
I talk to people who go to rehab, and they get this AA book that they've got to read everyday - really thick book. They go through all these 12 steps and do all this and that. It's crazy how everybody can sit and talk about rehab but if I come to say Christ was my rehab, it's not cool to say that. ... For me that's my rehab. That's what happened with me and it's an amazing and powerful thing.
I’m not going to let go of you. I’m going to hold you all night. So go ahead and feel whatever you feel. If you’re still craving cocaine, go ahead. You’re safe. You can crave it all you want, but I won’t let go, and if you still feel like you can’t trust yourself in the morning, and it’s what you want, I’ll drive you to rehab myself. Okay?" ~ Max
There are some great roles mostly in Shakespeare's tragedies which no one can play at full strength from beginning to end. One simply hopes that one can hit the peaks as often as one has the strength.
The great thing about running is that so often you wake up and you think: 'I really don't feel like this.' And even when you're up and out, that first kilometre is tough. But then once you get to 3km and you're getting to the end of the run, it's really fantastic.
When you're young, you're always wondering when you're actually going to feel like a grownup. And I think you probably fear it, in a sense, too. There's a danger to feeling like an adult... like this whimsical kid in you is going to die or something. And then all of a sudden, one day you kind of feel like an adult and it's really nice.
I never really think about what people are going to think of the movie afterwards. Or what people are going to call me. I just want to make a great project, and my focus is really all on that. And then I really don't read reviews. Like, you know, go on comment boards or anything.
Stories? We all spend our lives telling them, about this, about that, about people … But some? Some stories are so good we wish they’d never end. They’re so gripping that we’ll go without sleep just to see a little bit more. Some stories bring us laughter and sometimes they bring us tears … but isn’t that what a great story does? Makes you feel? Stories that are so powerful … they really are with us forever.
Actually, with those dirty movies, I find like, they're good for about fifteen, twenty minutes. I'm really interested. And, then, uh, there's one point, that all of a sudden I'm bored. You know? I just lose interest completely and I feel deeply ashamed.
All of a sudden I was Joan [Mad Man] and they're going, "Oh, so she plays a badass in this." And I'm like, "Oh my god, I get to play badasses." Firefly was a little bit of that, but she started out as a mouse and then she turned into a dragon. But I never really had that opportunity. So all of a sudden people were like, "Oh, do you feel like you're being typecast?" I would say, "No, this is just opening the doors." No one thought I could do it and someone finally trusted me to do it.
That was the turning point. It was as though the signal was there, 'This is the disease you're going to have to work against.' I never really stopped to think about anything else. It was that sudden.
Inside the Great Mystery that is, we don't really own anything. What is this competition we feel then, before we go, one at a time, through the same gate?
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