A Quote by Larry Gelbart
Most jokes state a bitter truth.
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Truth is the most bitter to accept, swallow and digest it. The moment you speak truth, you lose your popularity. But I don't care.
Yes, yes, I know all the jokes. What else could I have expected at Highbury? But I went to Chelsea and to Tottenham and to Rangers, and saw the same thing: that the natural state of a football fan is bitter disappointment, no matter what the score.
People can choose between the sweet lie or the bitter truth. I say the bitter truth, but many people don't want to hear it.
Whereas the truth is that the State in which the rulers are most reluctant to govern is always the best and most quietly governed, and the State in which they are most eager, the worst.
Jokes? There are no jokes. The truth is the funniest joke of all.
It’s just what they are — they’re jokes…most jokes are about Jewish people, rednecks, black folks…I can’t determine what offends another person.
Is it treason to say the truth? A bitter truth, but no less true for that.
A comedian is someone who tells the truth. Truth is the set of all jokes told by all comedians in the world.
Just because other people think something, that doesn't make it true. Maybe there's some truth in that, but it's unsatisfying, bitter-tasting truth.
Children come running to the truth But you've got to peel the skin to get the fruit And while one's living high another's grieving But what's sweet by morning is bitter by the evening Oh - What's sweet by morning is bitter by the evening.
I am still learning and experiencing things and feel like I cannot state a truth. So I guess one truth I know for sure is that I cannot state one. A paradox.
Let every one of us cultivate, in every word that issues from our mouth, absolute truth. I say cultivate, because to very few people - as may be noticed of most young children - does truth, this rigid, literal veracity, come by nature. To many, even who love it and prize it dearly in others, it comes only after the self-control, watchfulness, and bitter experience of years.
Life likes jokes; life is constantly making jokes, even at the most inopportune moments.
I use mother-in-law jokes, kid jokes, tax jokes - anything that works.
The Bill of Rights decoupled religion from the state, in part because so many religions were steeped in an absolutist frame of mind - each convinced that it alone had a monopoly on the truth and therefore eager for the state to impose this truth on others.
Truth is more of a stranger than fiction. When in doubt, tell the truth. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything. Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are economical in its use.
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