A Quote by Laurie Simmons
My subject has always been women. And I don't want to sound, like, preposterously idealistic, but I would like, in my lifetime, to experience a world where women, all kind of women, can connect and support each other.
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There are all kinds of ways in which women, together, change the world. And I don't mean that in a cheesy way. I'm not somebody who believes all women should support each other. I believe very strongly in women critiquing each other, just not critiquing each other more intensely because they're women.
The idea that women compete or don't like each other or undermine each other or sabotage each other, that's a big miss. That is not true at all. At all. My women connect with each other instantly and help each other.
Female directors really do need to support each other. Too many times I've been led to believe that my direct competition was other women, as if there can be only a handful of successful female filmmakers a year. That conversation, that perception, needs to change. Women are the people who have helped me make films I love, and I want to be that kind of strength to other women.
In the first two projects I've worked on professionally, I've been doing ensemble work with other young women, which I think is pretty cool. And they both were directed by and written by women. It's been a wonderful experience of real ensemble support and women lifting each other up, and I feel really lucky for that.
The biggest piece of advice I would give to other women and girls is that it's really hard, and I feel like we're promised in like these phrases like, "Never give up," and stuff like that, it's going to be easier if you just listen to them. In my experience, and I think the experience of my friends and other women around me, it's a lot - you have to do a lot for yourself because the world isn't as friendly to women and girls as it should be, and it's not as helpful as it should be.
Obviously I want to support women, and I believe in women, and I think we should support each other, but we shouldn't go into extremes. Some women can get very aggressive towards men, but we need men and love men, so keeping the right balance is the most important thing.
I always thought that there was nothing an antifeminist would want more than to have women only in women's organizations, in their own little corner empathizing with each other and not touching a man's world.
I do honestly think that if women were running the world there would be more investment in peace, because basically as women we do not want to see our children killed. Maybe I am completely idealistic, but until we see women in equal positions of power in the world, I just think that we are doomed.
I think that women of color use social media to make our voices heard with or without the amplification of white women. I also think that, many times, when white women want our support, they use an umbrella of 'women supporting women' and forget that they didn't lend the same kind of support.
I feel like women bond with other women in this nonverbal way, where they take on each other's gestures. You start dressing more like each other, you eat the same food... It's a way of expressing regard: I want to be like you. Which is flattering, but if you view it another way, terrifying.
I know there are certain men that hate women or don't like women, and in order to make women feel small, they tend to isolate them when they bully them. And women are often humiliated by it and feel they can't do anything about it. So my advice to women would be: there's always support around for those sorts of things and if you feel you're isolated in any way, or being bullied, you must talk to someone about it.
In my experience, not all women want to run the world. Not all women want to run a big banking conglomerate. Not all women want to be prime minister. What a lot of women want is a good career that respects them... and high-quality, affordable childcare.
I ask myself a lot how other women can be against the ideology that has to do with women empowering other women. Going along with the access of power and the status quo and forging a special position and the thought process that goes: I am not like those women. When it comes to things like assault, for example, perhaps it makes them feel safer. It's the denial: I'm okay. This won't happen to me. Acknowledging that the world is a profoundly unsafe for women is a scary thought.
For women in my lifetime things have changed quite a bit, but not enough. They have only changed for women that have education and access to health care in the Western world. But look at the rest of the world. Still in many places, women are sold into premature marriages, prostitution, forced labor; they are forced to have children that they cannot support or that they don't want. They are abused, tortured, exploited and even killed with impunity.
Women – love each other, support each other, defend each other. It comes at a greater cost to you to attack the women around you than it does to empower them.
Women sometimes really love to look at other beautiful women on the screen. But they don't look at a woman the way a man looks at a woman. They want to be that woman. They like if a woman is beautiful or sexy, especially if she's powerful. They like to see her catch a man, or to be powerful in the world. I think this is why a lot of women love noir films and classic films because they can really identify with these really strong, beautiful women. That's the kind of power that women have lost culturally.
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