A Quote by Lewis Black

If you don't drink 56 bottles of water a week, scientists say you should take a garden hose at the end of the week and shove it up your ass. — © Lewis Black
If you don't drink 56 bottles of water a week, scientists say you should take a garden hose at the end of the week and shove it up your ass.
It might sound crazy but you put your money up and take out a little every week. You put yourself on a salary instead of getting $7,000 this week, $20,000 next week and $5,000 the week after that. Take a $1,000. You got your toys, you got everything and your money under your mattress. Break it down and have a salary to take care of you and your family and stretch that money.
They haul you up there for, you know, week after week in this kind of star chamber proceeding. Then at the end of it they say, well, we found nothing, but now it's time for special counsel.
Does anybody who gave up smoking to save a pound a week have a pound at the end of the week? Not on your life.
Let The Rock understand this, he beats your ass in cage match last week and now your the number 1 contender? Well The Rock knows exactly why that is; you've got a three foot nose you turn it sideways and stick it straight up Vince's ass!
Having the security of being in a series week in, week out gives you great flexibility; you can experience with yourself, try a different scene different ways. If you make a mistake one week, you can look at it and say, 'Well, I won't do that again,' and you're still on the air next week.
The difference between camels and men; a camel can work a week and not drink; a man can drink a week and not work.
Every November, during the certain holiday people love so much, people take a dead turkey, open up the dead turkey’s ass, or carve out a really big hole in their ass, take some stuffing and shove it inside their dead empty ass, and use the little dead ass as an oven to bake some bread. Somebody else’s dead empty bacteria-laden ass to make bread? Ass bread?! And people think vegans are weird? Because we eat tofu? And rice, and beans, and lentils?
We had all week to rehearse. An audience would come in at the end of the week and we'd our little show. Most of the ad- libbing happened during the week on the show.
When I was working at Omega, I took this Zen retreat, where you're quiet, you don't say anything for a week, and this guy there said, "You're going to be enlightened at the end of this week, that's my goal." I was the engineer, so I was recording everything at it was happening, but I was also participating, because I felt like it. So at the end of it, I did understand what enlightenment was, one-hundred percent.
Because we're playing tournaments week in and week out I'd think to myself, 'What's the point in practising?' You have no down time to yourself and you're looking for some to spend with your family and friends. But I've now realised that with the game so cut-throat and standards going up every week, it doesn't work.
One week I'll get pancakes at Bongo Room, the next week I go to Kuma's Corner. But I always end up at Coldstone. I love ice cream.
WrestleMania is a week-long series of events, and the logistics of executing that week along with the week leading into it and the week after it are extraordinarily difficult in our own back yard.
You can't ring up another manager and say, 'Who do you think I should pick this week?' But you take the good and bad from people as you go along.
As a former presidential campaign manager, I remember the final week of the campaign as being the longest and most important week of the campaign. The week doesn't seem to end.
I have never stored water in plastic bottles, always in glass, steel or copper bottles and containers. I even carry my own water to work, and refill bottles for drinking.
It's very trying on a marriage when you're doing a one hour show, week after week after week. You don't have enough time for people that maybe you should have top priority.
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