A Quote by Lil Wayne
I know it's an experience that I need to have if God's putting me through it.
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I make soup and I back bread and I know my supreme need is joy in God and I know I can't experience deep joy in God until I deep trust in God. I shine sinks and polish through to the realization that trusting God is my most urgent need. If I deep trusted God in all the facets of my life, wouldn't that deep heal my anxiety, my self-condemnation, my soul holes? The fear is suffocating, terrorizing, and I want the remedy, and it is trust. Trust is everything. If fear keeps our lives small, does a life that receives all of God in this moment grow large too?
I refuse for any person or organized group to dictate to me what God is. That is really the height of insufferable hubris. I believe in just immediately putting to death or just putting over the cliff people who assume they know about God.
I have learned from personal experience that putting trust in God means there will be some unanswered questions. That was a hard lesson for me because I naturally want to understand everything... to know what's going on so I can feel like I'm in control.
I try to write into the heart of experience. Then, through the experience of the writing, that heart reveals itself to me. To write it down for others, as a door to go through it they choose, is the price of the experience, the price of the ticket. This is the demand that God, if you like, puts on you for being an artist.
You never know, God can take my ability away any day, so I just thank God for everything he does for me, and for putting my sister in my life and motivating me.
God, I know that if you bring me to it, you will bring me through it. I know you have a plan, but quite honestly I don’t see it right now. But I know it’s there. I know I have to believe. I know I need to have faith. I have to trust you. And I do trust you. But it’s hard right now.
How does God teach me love? By putting me around unlovely people. How does God teach me joy in the middle of grief? Not happiness, which is based on happenings. How does God teach me peace? Not when I am out fishing and everything is going my way and it doesn't get better than this. But in the middle of chaos. How does God teach me patience? By putting me in His waiting room.
My desire is to strive toward perfection; to be as much in harmony with God's will as possible; to live up to the highest light I have. I'm still not perfect, of course, but I grow daily... I am able to do everything I am called to do, and I do know what I need to know to do my part in the Divine Plan. And I do experience the happiness of living in harmony with God's will for me.
I am very comfortable not being the expert and actually putting people who work for me forward. I don't need to know all the answers, and I don't need to be the one who's out there up front.
I think I can tell you how I experience God. I experience God as the power of life calling me to live, I experience God as the power of love calling me to love. That's the God I see in Jesus of Nazareth, that's the God I see in the fourth gospel.
The immediacy of mystic experience simply means that we know God just as we know other objects. God is not a mathematical entity or a system of concepts mutually related to one another and having no reference to experience.
In explaining the growth of his faith, psychiatrist Gerald May writes, "I know that God is loving and that God’s loving is trustworthy. I know this directly, through the experience of my life. There have been plenty of times of doubt, especially when I used to believe that trusting God's goodness meant I would not be hurt. But having been hurt quite a bit, I know God's goodness goes deeper than all pleasure and pain it embraces them both." Ruthless Trust, pg 22
Because I'm a performer I can justify and sometimes sell the things about me that offend and shock the conventional world. I need to live life in the fast lane. I need to do things to excess. I need to go over the edge. I have an obligation to experience the things most people can't experience. The taboos. The things you're not supposed to know or do. That's part of my job. That's why I do it. I would probably do it anyway.
We need God in ways we do not know. Don't limit your experience of God to what you can think to ask. Ask for the unknown joy.
God comes through all people, in the way that people experience themselves. The beautiful part about God is that God is trans-cultural, and tends to reveal himself through the experiential filters of all people to whom he is revealed.
I know a lot of Christians who have been in ministry and walked away from it because the pressure can be too great. And there's a lot of Christians who at the same time would say like well why does God do [certain things]. What I found is Christians regardless of whatever their experience is who trust God more and learn to go through those moments of challenge and persevere. Usually the end result is an experience and interaction with the Holy Spirit that's greater than it was previously. And for me, there is no pursuit that I desire or enjoy more than that interaction.
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