A Quote by Lisa Lampanelli
I'm way too famous and rich to be on a dating app, but if I get very desperate by the time I'm 60, I'll go on Tinder. Or I'll go on 'Millionaire Matchmaker'; I'll call Patti Stanger.
Related Quotes
I have a Tinder account. Now I've done Bumble, and I've tried this other one, and the way I justified it is that... because I'm on TV, I shouldn't be eliminated from participating in what's going on in the world. But people are always like, 'I can't believe you're on a dating app!'
Every time I use an app, part of my brain dies! We'll get to the point where we go to bed and wonder: 'Did I have a thought today?' You'll have to go to your 'Thought' app!
One bulls-eye and you're rich and famous. The rich get more famous and the famous get rich. You're the talk of the town....The sense of so much depending on success is very hard to ignore, perhaps impossible. It leads to disproportionate anxiety and disproportionate relief or disappointment.
I'm on Tinder. I work mostly in gay clubs and I would have really bad relationships because I would meet aspiring models or bartenders or go-go dancers... not always the best choices! So I got on Tinder because one of my friends was on it. It's amazing. I can get more of what I like. I love it.
I was lucky enough to go see Steve Jobs with Marc Benioff. We were talking about the iPad, and one of the things Jobs said - and it was a little self-serving - was go and build your iPad app, and that is going to change the way you think about your online app, and you will go back, and you will redo your online app. I believe that.
The very rich, very poor, and the very famous get the worst medical care. The very rich can buy it, the very poor can't get any, and the very famous can dictate it.
I'm at a very frustrating point in my career because I'm not a millionaire. Like, people assume because you're in movies or TV, you're rich. I'm not rich, but I'm far from broke. I'm what you call a 'thousandaire.'
The fashion industry tends to attract people with serious personality defects. They just want to be rich and famous. But at some point you have to decide: Are you going to mindlessly go the easy way or are you going to go the ethical way?
To say that I'm enjoying a millionaire's lifestyle-well, I can tell you, I guess a millionaire's income doesn't go very far these days.
I have one girlfriend who is dating right now - she's divorced - and she's on Tinder, so we play Tinder. I know that's not a real game, but it's my favorite thing to do.
When you become rich and famous and you get a lot of attention, very few people get to go through that cycle without having a hard time. Everybody in their lives has a hard period. I don't know anybody who's ever been alive who hasn't had like, heartbreak, despair, depression, death, drug or alcohol, or weight problems, or health problems.
The best way for photographers to become rich and famous is to go into another field.
There are things about ourselves that we need to get rid of; there are things we need to change. But at the same time, we do not need to be too desperate, too ruthless, too combative. Along the way to usefulness and happiness, many of those things will change themselves, and the others can be worked on as we go. The first thing we need to do is recognize and trust our own Inner Nature, and not lose sight of it.
I'm not a matchmaker. I'm a horrible matchmaker. I always try. I'm not very good.
So I've decided to be a very rich and famous person who doesn't really care about money, and who is very humble but who still makes a lot of money and is very famous, but is very humble and rich and famous.
I can't go on Tinder; I'll get in trouble.
Related Authors
Bill Maher Quotes
American
Comedian
Craig Ferguson Quotes
Scottish
Comedian
David Letterman Quotes
American
Comedian
Demetri Martin Quotes
American
Comedian
Ellen DeGeneres Quotes
American
Comedian
George Carlin Quotes
American
Comedian
Jay Leno Quotes
American
Comedian
Jim Gaffigan Quotes
American
Comedian
Jimmy Fallon Quotes
American
Comedian
Joan Rivers Quotes
American
Comedian
Mitch Hedberg Quotes
American
Comedian
P. J. O'Rourke Quotes
American
Comedian
Robin Williams Quotes
American
Comedian
Rodney Dangerfield Quotes
American
Comedian
Stephen Colbert Quotes
American
Comedian
Steven Wright Quotes
American
Comedian