A Quote by Louis C. K.
When you have bacon in your mouth, it doesn't matter who's president.
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The perfect bacon sandwich is on white bread, very soft and very thick. Sourdough with a good crust. The bacon is half way to being crispy - and there's lots of it - and enough brown sauce to trickle down your arm. You've not really enjoyed a bacon sandwich unless 10 minutes later you're still licking your wrists.
Bacon, bacon, oh I love me some bacon! It's the secret ingredient to all my favorite recipes. I also could have it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner!
Let's all be honest here for a second, okay - bacon? Not even that good. Now, I'm not saying that it's bad. I like bacon-wrapped dates, and I've also been known to enjoy a BLT a couple of times a year. What I'm saying is, bacon is fine, but it is objectively not so good that we need bacon-scented sunscreen.
We always have microwavable bacon. It's like my family's favorite food in the world, and it's really low calorie actually. It's the easiest breakfast. I can make eggs and bacon really easily or a bagel with bacon.
I don't know if there is too much bacon! I used to have bacon parties. That's how much I love bacon.
My wife, trying to be helpful, goes to the grocery store and buys this stuff called soy bacon. Let me tell you something: I know soy beans are good for a lot of things. Let's stay out of the bacon market! It says It looks and tastes like real bacon! No it doesn't! It tastes like somebody bacon-flavored a turd, that's what it tastes like!
Bacon. Let's talk about bacon. There's no meat more glorious than bacon. You can add it to pasta instead of cheese. You can stick it in a sandwich, er... instead of cheese.
I always use my 'Holy Trinity' which is salt, olive oil and bacon. My motto is, 'bacon always makes it better.' I try to use bacon and pork products whenever it can.
I've long said that if I were about to be executed and were given a choice of my last meal, it would be bacon and eggs. There are few sights that appeal to me more than the streaks of lean and fat in a good side of bacon, or the lovely round of pinkish meat framed in delicate white fat that is Canadian bacon. Nothing is quite as intoxicating as the smell of bacon frying in the morning, save perhaps the smell of coffee brewing.
Republican candidate George Pataki said his dogs would give him the best endorsement for becoming our next president. Until they hear Chris Christie always carries bacon in his pockets. (Joke's on them, though, he's never going to give them any of that pocket bacon. It's what gets him through long meetings!)
Teeth represent only 10 percent of the surface of your mouth and bacteria live throughout the whole mouth. When you stop brushing, bacteria left behind resettle on your teeth and gums. Oil pulling reaches virtually 100 percent of the mouth, thereby affecting all bacteria, viruses, fungi, and protozoa in the mouth.
After awhile you realize that putting your actions where your mouth is makes you less likely to have to put your money where your mouth is.
Obama is not an African American president, but a president of all Americans. It doesn't matter if you are black, white, Hispanic, he's the president of all races.
True Friends are the bacon bits
In the salad bowl of life. How true
I read that and straight away,
My thoughts turned to you
And especially today on your 60th
These special wishes I send
Have a really wonderful birthday
My special "bacon flavored" friend
Onions and bacon cooking up just makes your kitchen smell so good. In fact, one day I'm going to come up with a room deodorizer that smells like bacon and onions. It's a fabulous smell.
All science requires mathematics.
[Editors' summary of Bacon's idea, not Bacon's wording.]
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