A Quote by Margo Jefferson
When people start reconfiguring marriage, there's no going back.
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But people try love and because they are unconscious... their longing is good, but their love is full of jealousy, full of possessiveness, full of anger, full of nastiness. Soon they destroy it. Hence for centuries they have depended on marriage. Better to start by marriage so that the law can protect you from destroying it. The society, the government, the court, the policeman, the priest, they will all force you to live in the institution of marriage, and you will be just a slave. If marriage is an institution, you are going to be a slave in it. Only slaves want to live in institutions.
My marriage was breaking up, and my marriage with Chong was breaking up. I had to come back and kind of start on my own again.
You get to decide how you're going to look and what you're going to be when you grow up and when people learned that my parents actually had an arranged marriage people thought that was the most horrific thing on earth. I mean how could anybody allow their marriage of all things to be prescribed by somebody else?
... fighting for gay marriage generally involves lying about what we are going to do with marriage when we get there-because we lie that the institution of marriage is not going to change, and that is a lie. The institution of marriage is going to change, and it should change. And again, I don't think it should exist.
I'm not going to change. I'm not going to start clubbing or going out in limos. I'm laid-back, and I'm going to stay that way.
Marriage has got historic, religious and moral content that goes back to the beginning of time and I think a marriage is as a marriage has always been, between a man and a woman.
We have to concentrate back on: Where is the money going? Where's it been going for the last thirty years? How do we start to redistribute the cake more evenly, and give people opportunities? That's as much about poor white people in West Virginia as it is about poor black people on the Southside of Chicago.
Fall is my favorite my time of the year. I love it. I'll try and make it back to Vancouver a bunch. I love going back home for that. Everything turns orange. You start to get out of summer, start making your way into the winter, everyone is wearing jackets. Vancouver lights up in the fall, so I definitely go back there for a bit.
Marriage is an ongoing, centuries-long social experiment that is mostly controlled by the individuals in the relationships who insist on determining what the relationship terms are going to be. And that's why the terms of marriage change with every century and decade. We're shaping it from the inside. Marriage endures because it evolves. Obviously it does. None of us would accept marriage on its 13th century terms, not even the most conservative people...
You are going to survive. And good things are going to start to happen again. And one day you are going to look back and this will not even be such a bad thing
Not going back is fine. Not going back but occasionally visiting might be best. Not going back but remembering so you don’t see the same view twice. Not going back so you can turn a new page, write a new chapter, develop an entire new list. Not going back so you can stretch and grow and see yourself in a light that you never knew existed. Not going back so that you can fly. Fly.
The first thing is love: love deeply. If you have been with a person for a few years, in deep love, and you have experienced all the joys and all the miseries, and still you decide to be with the person, then marriage is okay. Because marriage is only a legal arrangement, it cannot make anything more beautiful than it is. It can only make it ugly, it cannot beautify it. Once it is settled legally, once you start taking each other for granted, things will start going down rather than rising high.
Now that I've got the will of the people at my back, I'm going to start enforcing the one-question rule. That was three questions.
For awhile there, I kind of hit the plateau. Anytime you do that as an artist, one of two things can happen... you're either going to start to fall back off, or you're gonna start to rise.
If you had a job, and every day you're going back home and telling all your friends how horrible your job is and how horrible your employer is, after a while, they're going to start believing you. And then at some point, they're going to start questioning you and say, 'Why, if it's so bad, are you doing it?'
Marriage takes perseverance and determination. There are always opportunities to walk away from marriage but I feel very strongly that you have a responsibility once you start a family.
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