A Quote by Marina Abramovic
When I first had a video camera to document a performance, it was in Sweden and I remember it was really crucial for me.
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Performance was a shock to me. The first time I remember feeling I could do it was during the making of my first video, 'Fun for Me.' I couldn't sleep the night before the shoot, I was so frightened. I had to play a ghost and a piece of merchandise in a shop window, and I had no idea whether I was going to be able to pull it off.
For me, the first thing I fell madly in love with when I was little, was, Gilda Radner had this live performance that she had done at the Met that was on tape, and I could rent it from Video Video in New Jersey where I lived, and so I literally would rent it every two weeks.
The main reason I went to digital was because I got time-lapse, video, and still images all in one camera. Having a minimal amount of gear is really important for someone who wants to walk around. That allowed me to have this flexibility to document things in different ways.
No one was jumping up and saying, 'Yeah, let me give you money.' I had never held a camera in my hand - a home video camera, nothing. I had not directed.
I've been acting since I was 2 and have always been on camera but doing a video is different because when you're acting, you pretend the camera's not there and you just do the scene and with a music video you're right in the camera so it feels weird sometimes.
I was probably five when I first picked up a camera. My mom had an Olympus OM-10 that she carried around to document our family photos. And I just always loved it.
I can't remember exactly how old I was when my parents gave me my first camera, but it was a Canon, and I was certainly far too young to have such a good camera.
I fell in love with the process of taking pictures, with wandering around finding things. To me it feels like a kind of performance. The picture is a document of that performance.
I was shocked the first time the paps got me in America - when a video camera is put in your face and you're asked questions and 15 people are walking backwards taking your picture. I was coming out of a pizza shop and had my daughter with me.
I've picked a camera up a few times. I remember buying my first camera when I was about 18 and really going wild with it, as you do as an 18-year-old, especially when you're in college.
The music video, Lil Nas X, he asked me to be in the 'Panini' music video. It was crazy. I was just listening to the song and I was like, okay, this is going to be my first music video but it was really fun.
I moved to L.A. I wasn't really sure what I wanted to do, but I really like the entertainment industry. I started to make videos on YouTube to get more comfortable being in front of the camera. The first video I filmed was with my sister.
I do come alive in front of a camera. The first video I ever made was a formative moment for me.
And treating poetry as a performing art emphasizes its ephemerality. A printed poem can be endlessly reprinted, photocopied, scanned, uploaded, cut and pasted - but a performance, even if somebody's there with a video camera, is one time only: the audience experiences something that won't exist when the performance is over, and which won't ever be reproduced in exactly the same form. I find that appealing.
The first job I had was a Pampers commercial. And I used to go with my father whenever he would do a performance. I remember clinging to his legs, saying, 'Please. Take me with you.'
When I uploaded my very first video, I was just looking for something to make me happy. I was confused about what I was doing in my life and had earned a degree that I didn't really enjoy. With that video, I was finally doing something I was passionate about. So it was my way of self-medicating.
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